


30 Day OTP Challenge STUCKY EDITION

by ShameTheDevil



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 1940's, AU, AYY, Alcohol, Anal, Angry Steve, Apocalypse, Arguing, Ass groping, Bets, Birthdays, Bittersweet, Bucky&Nat friendship, Bucky's a white girl, Christmas, Crying, Dancing, Dark, Depressing, Drunk Kissing, Dying together, Emotional, End of the World, Fingering, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Friendship goals, Gay Sex, Growing Old, Heats, Housemates, Idiots in Love, Images, Implied Sexual Content (for now), Insecure Steve, M/M, Making Out, Metaphors, Modern times, NSFW, Nat&Steve friendship, Natasha&Sam, Omega Verse, Parties, Peggy & Bucky friendship, Pet Names, Porn, Possessive Bucky, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Pretend Boyfriends, Questioning sexualities, Reunions, Roommates, Sad, Shy Steve, Sick Fic, Starbucks, Steve introducing Buck to technology, Time Skips, Videogames, because im romantic as fuck ok, because tf am i meant to write something decent, bit steamy, bottom!Steve, bruh, bucky's a good friend, deep, dont listen to me, drunk, emotional blackmail, failed dates (kind of), fuck the rules, gazing into eachothers eyes, historically inacurate, homophobia (kind of), i'm doing like 3, i'm not doing one a day, im a bad person, im a shitty therapist, im so sorry, kissing in the dark, love for life, magic i guess, mentions of torture, natasha&Wanda are baes, oblivious idiots, old songs, peggy and steve were friends before the war, romantic, sam&Wanda&bucky are the avengers aswell, scared Bucky, setting the atmosphere, sleeping the same bed, soldier!bucky, some are my own, steve and bruce fuck up, steve+bucky+peggy+howard squad, suicide triggers, taking care of each other, they shouldn't be let into a lab, throwback thursday, tony&nat are my spirit animals, weird ass, with the prompt 'ice cream'
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-19
Updated: 2016-06-17
Packaged: 2018-04-21 13:50:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 35,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4831418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShameTheDevil/pseuds/ShameTheDevil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a bunch of one shots 'bout Steve and Bucky y'all ;)<br/>A mix of pre-First Avenger and post-Winter Soldier.<br/>Enjoy!<br/>Leave Kudos and Comments please. x</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Rise to the top of the world, America, America, don't you cry

**Day 1 – Holding Hands**

 

Bucky faced Steve, his face impassive. The blonde sighed and scraped his chair back.

“I wish you’d talk to me Buck,” he whispered to the other man. Bucky didn’t say anything, just looked down. A piece of his long, brown hair fell in front of his face and the blonde reached his hand out as if to brush it behind his ear. The Winter Soldier flinched away, and Steve dropped his hand helplessly. “I’m sorry Bucky, please…just tell me what I did wrong.”

Bucky looked at him, and Captain America could’ve sworn that his resolve cracked a tiny little bit, and a type of vulnerability appeared in the man’s eyes…but it was gone as soon as it appeared. The Winter Soldier said nothing. Steve sighed again and got up,

“I’ll swing by on Wednesday, okay?” he asked softly. Bucky didn’t reply, so Steve left the room.

***

Steve and Bucky stared at each other in silence. The Winter Soldier’s hands were in handcuffs, in case he decided to attack or kill Steve. The blonde thought it was ridiculous – Bucky had many chances to already murder him when he had weapons, strength and opportunity. Why would he attempt it in a prison where he was alone, watched and defenceless?

“Is this really necessary?” Steve hadn’t meant to snap, but he did. Fury raised an eyebrow at him,

“Yes, Rogers. It’s necessary. He could attack you,” the man grumbled. Steve ran a hand through his hair,

“C’mon Fury. He’s not going to try anything.”

“It don’t matter, Rogers,” Fury cut him off, “you have twenty minutes though I doubt he’ll talk to you.”

The S.H.I.E.L.D leader walked out briskly, and slammed the door behind him. An awkward silence settled between the two once best friends. Bucky fidgeted in his seat, and the metal of the handcuffs dug into his wrists. Steve wanted him to stop hurting, to open up. He wanted him to remember and he wanted to take him home, show him New York – show him how much everything had changed…

“Buck-” Steve reached for him, intending to open the handcuffs (with force – he didn’t have the key), but Bucky stumbled back so much his chair tripped over. Somehow, the brunette managed to keep his balance and he backed himself up into the corner, glaring at Steve. The blonde looked at him helplessly and, not for the first time, wondered what HYDRA had done to him.

“I’m sorry.” Captain America said, got up, and walked out. He didn’t see the tears in Bucky’s eyes.

***

The next time Steve came to see Bucky was five days later. He brought a two old pictures with him, back from the war. They were of him and Bucky – a photo of Steve after the serum, when the two stood with their team in the snow, grinning from ear to ear, looking so happy. The other from his aunt’s wedding, both of them wore their best-Sunday clothes and were sitting on chairs, smiling, Bucky broadly and Steve shyly, as they sipped on glass bottles of coke.

Steve gently pushed them across the table for Bucky to see. The brunette looked at him angrily, unsure, a bit curious…

“It’s alright,” Steve smiled, “they’re just old pictures. Of us,” realization dawned on him, that maybe Bucky didn’t want to look, didn’t want to _remember._ The blonde’s smile disappeared off his face, and he reached for the photographs, “You don’t have to look if you don’t want to-”

“I want to.” Bucky said hoarsely. Steve blinked at him, and then pulled his hand back. It was the first time Bucky spoke since he’d found him…and the first time he said something that didn’t sound vaguely threatening. “Could you…?” Bucky asked vaguely waving his handcuffed hands around. 

“Err…sure,” Steve said, “Just gimme a minute.” And he ran out of the room, leaving a confused Bucky behind. Steve sprinted to where he knew Natasha would be – in the training room. And sure enough, the redhead was kicking and hacking at a dummy like her life depended on it.

“Hey Nat!” Steve called, not even out of breath. Sweaty Natasha looked at him, and went back to her training,

“What up, Rogers?”

“You know how you owe me favour?” Steve asked, and didn’t wait for an answer. “I need it now. More specifically – I need you to give me the key to Bucky’s handcuffs,” he said, and then quickly added ‘please’ because his mamma raised him right. Natasha rolled her eyes,

“How do you know I’ve got them?” she asked.

“Because you have a copy of almost every key in the compound?”

Natasha thought about that for a moment and then nodded,

“You’re right,” she said. And then quickly pulled a silver key out of the pocket of her coat. She tossed it at Steve.

“Thanks!” the blonde yelled, already running.

Bucky was still in his chair when he got back. Steve held up the key triumphantly and Bucky raised an eyebrow,

“Natasha,” Steve explained, and knelt down in front of The Winter Soldier, figuring it would seem less threatening.

“She’s the redhead right?” Bucky asked quietly. Steve took his hand in his and jumped at the sudden contact, but didn’t pull his hand away.

“Yeah. She’s my best friend,” Steve said. He slotted the key into the handcuffs, “I’ll introduce you two, I think you’d like her. You were always into feisty girls.” Steve winced as soon as he said that. He knew Bucky hated these little ‘reminders’ that Steve dropped on him. But sometimes the blonde forgot…

The handcuffs clicked and slid from Bucky’s wrists. The brunette started rubbing the reddened skin, and Steve reached for the photos. He offered them to the Solider silently, sitting crossed legged on the carpet. Hesitantly, Bucky took the photographs.

Steve watched his expression change as he looked at them. Anger, uncertainty, pain, disbelief, a bit of happiness, hopefulness…

“C-Could I keep them?” he asked quietly, unsure. Steve looked at him,

“Um, yeah, sure…I’ll just make a copy for myself…”

Bucky nodded. They started at each other silently, Steve still on the floor. The silence wasn’t really awkward…Bucky was just studying Steve’s face, as if trying to remember.

“Could I hold your hand?” Bucky blurted. Steve’s eyes widened, but he didn’t hesitate. He reached his hand up and Bucky grasped it in his own. His skin was a bit clammy and he was shaking. “It’s just that you have nice hands,” Bucky mumbled, “and they’re warm, and everything round here’s cold.”

“I could take you out you know,” Steve offered. He was rubbing slow circled into Bucky’s palm, and the Soldier’s eyes fluttered closed, “Fury might agree for lunch or coffee, an hour or two…and if you cooperate and tell them everything then maybe you can leave…stay with me or something,” Captain America was speaking in soft tones. Bucky’s eyes opened,

“If I do that,” he whispered and cleared his throat, “will I be able to go stay with you?”

“Yeah,” Steve smiled brightly. Fury walked in suddenly,

“What are you two lovebirds up to?” the director grumbled, his long jacket sweeping the floor, “Rogers you’re on duty. Get out of here.”

“Yes sir,” Steve said and let go of Bucky’s hand. The brunette suddenly looked sad. Steve bit his lip,

“I’ll come see you Wednesday, alright?” he asked, “I’ll try to get permission for…next time? Okay?”  

“Yeah, alright,” Bucky said, and he smiled for the first time. Steve’s heart ached as he turned around and left. He was getting that goddamn coffee permission.


	2. I don't sleep so well at night, waiting up and shivering

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and Comments pleasee!

Chapter 2  - Cuddling somewhere

“Your elbow’s in my ribs.” Bucky grumbled.

“Shut up, Buck,” Steve grumbled tiredly. Bucky sighed. He thought again about how it was a horrible idea to take Steve to his aunts wedding, especially now that they had to share the tiny bed in the tiny spare room. In the middle of winter. Who the hell has a winter wedding?!

Bucky decided that when he gets married he will have a beautiful summer wedding…there will be white tents erected in a sunny park, and the theme will be sunflowers…yes, sunflowers would go beautifully with Steve’s golden hair…

“Bucky, stop spacing out and move your leg!” Steve hissed. Bucky groaned. How did someone so tiny get to be so freaking annoying?!

“Can you just turn around?” Bucky asked. It was dark but he could still see Steve’s glare perfectly. His hair was a little bit mused by the pillow, and his eyes were half closed. It had been a long, long day…Bucky was exhausted, but he couldn’t help but notice how Steve’s hair looked silver in the soft moonlight falling in through the window, and how his eyes seemed really bright, and how close he was…

“Stop _staring_ ,” Steve whispered, blushing. Bucky smiled when the blonde looked away.

“Geez, sorry, what else am I meant to look at?” Bucky rolled his eyes, trying to seem casual. Steve pouted,

“You’re not meant to be lookin’. You’re meant to be sleepin’,” he mumbled. Bucky momentarily got distracted by the blonde’s cut expression.

“Huh?” he mumbled intelligently.

“Stop staring!” Steve yelled-whispered.

“Hey! It’s not my fault you’re so-” Bucky trailed off. Steve blinked at him, and then narrowed his eyes,

“So what?” he demanded.

“Nothing,” Bucky closed his eyes. Steve poked him in the chest,

“Hey! Finish the sentence!” he hissed. Bucky removed his hand,

“Just go to sleep Stevie.”

“You were going to say skinny weren’t you?!” Steve hissed, sitting up, “or bony! Well I’m sorry that I’m so uncomfortable to sleep with!” Steve was getting himself worked up. Bucky opened his eyes, and saw Steve glaring daggers at him, “it’s not exactly my fault, and you really don’t have to be so mean about it Bucky! Just because we’re friends doesn’t mean it’s okay to-”

“I was gonna say beautiful okay?” Bucky grumbled. Then he sighed, and closed his eyes again, getting comfortable even though his heart was pounding like crazy. Steve looked at him with wide eyes, “I’m staring because you look really beautiful. Can you go to sleep now?”

Steve was quiet for a moment, face burning bright red, before he flopped down on the pillows, turned to face the wall.

“Okay.” He said quietly, heart beating fast, “goodnight Buck.”

Bucky wrapped a strong arm around Steve’s skinny frame, and pulled him up against his chest.

“Goodnight, Stevie.”

Steve smiled softly to himself and closed his eyes.

“Also, you’re really goddamn skinny, move your elbow punk.”

“Shut up,” Steve mumbled, but he was still smiling.


	3. Searching to find myself but all I find is you

**Day 3 - Watching a movie**

 

Steve jumped nearly a foot in the air when Bucky got out of bed, pointing his gun at the TV.

“Bucky no!” Steve yelled. Bucky blinked as the Disney logo appeared on-screen. The two were in Steve’s room in the Avengers Tower, and Steve thought it would be a brilliant idea to show Bucky The Lion King.

“What is it!? Is it a device by Hydra?!” Bucky demanded, gun still pointed at the television. It looked a little bit funny – the threatening position paired with Bucky’s man-bun and panda-printed pyjamas. Steve got up from bed and gently removed the gun from Bucky’s hands, placing it on the bedside table.

“It’s just a TV, Buck,” the blonde said, kissing the side of the brunette’s head. Bucky unwillingly got back in bed with Steve. The two leaned against the fort of pillows, and Steve gently slid an arm around Bucky’s waist. The brunette snuggled up to his side, pressing his head into Steve’s shoulders.

“It’s like the films they played in the cinema?” Bucky asked and Steve nodded, “Then how come they’re all in colour?”

“Technology, Bucky. It’s truly wonderful,” Steve whispered. The opening scene began playing, and now Bucky watched with curiosity mixed with uncertainty.

They were about half way when Bucky spoke up again,

“So why are these animals talking?” he asked, “and how come there’s so much singing?”

“Aw, c’mon don’t you like it?” Steve laughed. Bucky shrugged.

“It’s alright,” he mumbled, “Simba’s hot.” He added with an evil twinkle in his eye.

“Don’t tell me you find an animated lion _hot_.” Steve scoffed. Bucky was smirking as he looked up at the blonde.

“Don’t worry,” he cooed, “I don’t find him as hot as you.” He said, pressing a kiss to Steve’s jaw. The blonde smiled affectionately and turned his eyes back to the movie. He began humming ‘can you feel the love tonight.’

“Oh shut up, you punk.” Bucky grumbled. Steve leaned down and began whispering the words into Bucky’s ear. The brunette pressed his hand against Steve’s face, effectively pushing him away, “Get away from me you creep,” Bucky laughed. Steve licked the hand pressed to his face, and Bucky screeched, trying to pull away. Steve laughed and pulled the struggling, giggling brunette back until he was safely in his lap. Bucky glared at him through the few brown strands of hair that escaped his bun,

“I hate you.”

Steve smiled and kissed his nose,

“Just watch the movie. It’s getting good.”


	4. We were never welcome here

**Day 4 – Going on a date**

 

“Bucky where the  hell are we going?” Steve grumbled as he followed his best friends through the streets of Manhattan. It was dark out, but the streets were lit by numerous pubs, with soldiers spilling out of them, dames at their arms, laughing.

“We’re going on a date, I already told you.” Bucky grinned at Steve over his shoulder, his short hair ruffled.

“And I told you that I don’t _want_ to go on anymore dates,” Steve complained, catching up to Bucky’s long strides, slightly out of breath. “The dames always prefer you, not that I’m surprised, and I end up having a rotten time.”

Bucky slowed down a little bit,

“You’ll love it today. I promise!” he said, smiling brightly. He came to a stop in front of a club. “The ladies wait inside, let’s go!” he told Steve. The blonde rolled his eyes but followed his best friend inside. Soldiers, young men and girls littered every corner, crowding around tables, kissing and laughing, smoking cigarettes, drinking wine and telling war stories. Steve immediately felt out of place, kind of stalling behind Bucky, as the brunette smiled broadly at two gorgeous girls.

One was a tall blonde, with bright blue eyes and a loud voice, the other a petite brunette with cold grey eyes, and a frown on her face.

“Ladies!” Bucky exclaimed, sauntering over.

“Well if it isn’t Mr James Buchanan Barnes,” the blonde drawled. Bucky slid an arm around her waist,

“This is my friend, Steve,” he introduced the blonde. The brunette looked…disappointed. Steve’s heart fell.

“Mhm,” the blonde said distractedly, not even looking at Steve, “how ‘bout we go dance, soldier?” she winked at Bucky. The brunette grinned at Steve, and then he was hurrying off with his dame. An awkward silence settled over Steve and the other girl. With a wince, the blonde realized that the girl was a few inches taller than him.

“So…um, I’m Steve,” he offered with a shy smile. The girl crossed her arms over her chest and raised an eyebrow at him,

“Betty.” She said coldly. Steve’s hands began to sweat. He hated these situations, and in his head he cursed Bucky for dragging him along on yet another ‘date.’ Couldn’t the brunette just go by himself?! It would save Steve all this embarrassment and resentment…

“Care to dance?” Steve tried half-heartedly. Betty gave him a critical once-over,

“No thanks, honey,” she said, “wouldn’t want to break you.” And then she turned around, walking off to talk to some, tall, handsome soldier. Steve was left standing awkwardly by himself, bright red from embarrassment. He gulped and walked backwards, until he located the door. The blonde stumbled outside into the cool night air. Nobody outside even glanced at him. The boy hurried off to the closest alleyway, ignoring the sharp pain in his lung, and his heart racing and the tears that stung his eyes.

He leaned against a wall, breathing hard. Such a short walk and he was already out of breath. The boy fumbled for the asthma pump he had in his pocket, and he pumped it into his mouth. When his breathing evened out, he slid down the wall, sitting down on the cold ground. He pulled his knees up to his chest, laid down on his forearms and started crying.

He didn’t understand why this _always_ happened to him. Dozens of dames that Bucky picked out for him, short ones as well, and not one of them took him seriously. It wasn’t his fault he was so small and skinny and sickly. Was he really that bad…? Couldn’t any of them find it in themselves to at least give him a chance? Was he really that unappealing?

“...Steve?” Bucky’s slightly-out-of-breath voice startled Steve out of his misery. The boy quickly wiped at his eyes, trying to look like he wasn’t just dwelling in self-pity. But he knew that Bucky knew from the look the taller boy was giving him.

“Yeah? What’s up Buck?” Steve tried to say casually as he stood up, “where’s you girl? Did she leave?”

“No,” Bucky said softly, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his trousers, “but I saw you were gone and Betty was with someone else…and I just wanted to make sure you’re alright?” The last part sounded like a question.

“I’m swell,” Steve said bitterly, “Abso-fucking-lutely brilliant. Now go back to your date, I’m going home.” The small boy tried to walk around Bucky but the other easy grabbed him and held him in front of him. The brunette frowned when Steve wouldn’t meet his eyes.

“I’m really sorry, Stevie,” he murmured holding the boy’s shoulders, “that girl was stupid. She doesn’t know what she’s missing out on.”

Steve laughed humourlessly,

“Oh yeah, she sure is missing out on a lot,” he said sarcastically, “skinny, defenceless man who looks like a _child,_ and has asthma attacks every other night.” Steve could feel the tears returning to his eyes, “just let me go home, Bucky.” He said, trying to get out of the other boy’s grip.

“No.” Bucky grumbled and pulled Steve into his arms, holding him tightly. The blonde stopped fighting and went limp in Bucky’s arms. The bigger boy didn’t loosen his grip. “She’s missing out on an amazing, kind, funny, beautiful boy,” he murmured into Steve’s ear, “You’re absolutely wonderful Stevie, and if she can’t see that then to hell with her.”

Steve gave a little laugh but it sounded sad.

“If I’m so bloody wonderful why don’t you date me yourself?” it slipped out of the blonde’s mouth before he could stop himself. Steve blushed and his heart dropped when Bucky stepped back. He did it – he ruined their friendship. Now would come the questions, ‘don’t you like girls Steve?’ and then the disgust and…

But Bucky was looking at him in a way that made Steve’s stomach do a weird flip, and his heart speed up. The brunette’s hands were loosely wrapped around Steve’s waist.

“Trust me,” Bucky said quietly, his eyes searching Steve’s face, “if you’d even consider giving me a chance, I would.”

Steve stared at him with wide eyes, his face burning. He cradled his own, shaking hands to his chest.

“R-Really?” he asked. Bucky smiled and raised his hand and cradled Steve’s cheek. The blonde’s hand shot up and he pressed it over Bucky’s.

“Yeah. Really,” the brunette murmured. He took a deep breath, “would you let me take you out on a date, Steve?”

“Of course, you moron.” Steve rolled his eyes. Bucky grinned and wrapped and arm around Steve’s shoulders.

“Alright you punk. For now, let’s go home,” he said happily, as he and Steve walked out of the alleyway. They walked right past Betty and her friend, and Bucky didn’t even look at them. He only had eyes for Steve.


	5. To the center of your heart, oh Cleopatra is the only one you loved

**Day 5 – Kissing**

 

Bucky and Natasha were chilling at the bar at one of Tony’s parties, drinking and talking and glaring at everyone. It just wasn’t a good night for them, all the avengers and agents seemed to have _someone_ to dance or make out with, but Nat and Bucky were single pringles for the night. Natasha pulled a face as Clint and his wife sauntered past, their hands interlocked, bright smiles on their faces.

“God, they’re gross,” Bucky sulked, though he didn’t really mean it.

“Word.” Natasha downed the rest of her Bloody Mary and asked the bartender for another one as Bucky nursed his _Sex on the Beach_ , looking around. This was his second party at the Avengers Tower – during the first one he hadn’t stepped away from Steve for even a second, assaulted by all the new technology, music and clothes, but this party Steve seemed to disappear somewhere with Wanda.

“You’re looking for him,” Natasha pointed out, noticing how Bucky’s gaze kept wandering off. The brunette shrugged awkwardly,

“Yeah, I guess…I just like knowing that he’s…you know…safe.”

“Well,” Natasha snorted into her drink, “I’m sure he’s safe with Wanda. They’re in his room right now, though I don’t think you’d want to interrupt.”

Bucky’s eyes widened,

“S-Steve and _Wanda_?!” he asked in disbelief. Natasha shrugged,

“I don’t know.” She admitted, “could be.” Then the redhead sighed, “we should dance. I’m a bit buzzed.”

“Fine. Let’s go.” Bucky agreed and pulled Natasha onto the dance floor. However he soon figured out that he didn’t know how to do this ‘modern’ dancing thing… “Um. Little help please?”

Natasha laughed and then she started _rubbing_ against Bucky. The brunette freaked,

“Natasha! What the hell are you doing?!” he demanded. The redhead laughed over the loud music,

“Dancing of course,” she said with a grin. Bucky was flushed red and uncomfortable, but he decided to sway with the redhead. “So,” he yelled over the music, “what exactly are Steve and Wanda doing in his room?!”

“He’s showing her his shield.”

“Seriously?” Bucky inquired, bewildered. Natasha rolled her eyes,

“Of course not, dumbass.” She said.

“So…,” Bucky refused to drop the topic, “are they like kissing…?”

“Kissing. Having sex.” Natasha said casually, “who knows with the two. Are you going to dance or ask questions?”

“I…I don’t really like this new style of dancing,” Bucky admitted, “sorry, doll.”

Natasha laughed and pulled him off of the dancefloor. They settled back by the bar, and Bucky glimpsed Pepper and Tony, shamelessly making out in the corner.

“How can they do that?” he asked the redhead, “just kiss like that in public?”

“It’s pretty easy,” Natasha said, “when was the last time you kissed someone?”

“Um…,” Bucky tried to think, “probably like seventy years ago. I don’t know. Steve says I used to be quite the ladies man.”

Natasha nodded, and sipped at whatever new alcoholic drink she got. Bucky felt nice and warm, and he decided that one drink was enough for him. He looked over at Natasha. She was pretty, in a very fierce, terrifying way. Although Bucky preferred blondes, he didn’t mind redheads…

“Do you want to kiss?” he asked. Natasha blinked at him, and laughed.

“Alright then, cowboy,” she said, and stood up, standing in front of the Winter Soldier. Bucky hesitantly placed his hands on Natasha’s waist. She was a bit gone, and he felt guilty for getting her to kiss him while drunk, but he knew she didn’t like him in that way, and neither did he. It was just one kiss, goddammit.  

The redhead placed her hands loosely around Bucky’s neck and leaned down. Their lips met, but there was no spark, no nothing. Still it was nice to have human contact again, and Bucky eagerly kissed Natasha back. It only lasted about a few seconds.

“Woo hoo!” Tony yelled, and Bucky and Nat pulled apart, “get in there Bucky!” and then he was being pulled towards the bedroom by Pepper. Natasha smiled at Bucky and over her shoulder he could see Steve. With a horrified, angry look on his face. Bucky tensed and Nat must’ve felt it because she stepped out of his embrace and turned around, in time to see a fuming Steve stalking their way.

“Oh-oh, here comes trouble,” she said, grabbed her glass and downed the rest of her drink. Steve came to a stop in front of them, hands in fists. He didn’t say anything, just glared at Natasha. The redhead seemed unfazed.

“’Sup, Steve,” she offered.

“How was Wanda?” Bucky offered. Steve turned his glare onto his best friend,

“What are you talking about?” he demanded, “I was showing her my shield.”

Natasha laughed out loud at this. She stood up and grabbed her drink, her balance perfect,

“Well I’ll leave you two to it,” she said, and with a wave she was gone. Steve turned to Bucky, who was casually sitting on the tall bar chair.

“Care to tell me what the hell that was about?” Steve fumed. Bucky blinked at him,

“Err…what do you mean?” he asked.

“You and Natasha making out!” Steve yelled like it was the most obvious thing ever.

“It was just a kiss.”

“Why were you kissing her?!” Steve asked.

“Why do you want to know?” Bucky raised an eyebrow, “I don’t recall you ever having a problem with me kissing ladies.”

“Yeah…but…it’s _Natasha!”_ Steve said, exasperated. Something in Bucky’s heart dropped,

“So what? You sweet on her or something?” he asked. Steve blinked and flushed a deep red.

“W-What?!” he spluttered, “of c-course not! I just didn’t know you were the kind of person to go around making out with random people.”

“ _Kissing.”_ Bucky specified. Steve’s brows furrowed,

“Doesn’t matter!” he yelled, agitated. Bucky looked at him,

“Are you jealous?” he asked, a smile spreading on his face. Steve flushed an even brighter red,

“N-No of c-course not, d-don’t be r-ridiculous!” the blonde stuttered. Bucky started laughing,

“Oh my God, you are! You’re _jealous_!”

“Shut up,” Steve grumbled looking away. Bucky continued smiling as he reached for the loops in Steve’s belt, tugging him closer.

“I can kiss you too if you want,” he offered. Steve looked at him. They were now almost touching, with Bucky looking up at Steve. The blonde looked uncertain as he stood between Bucky’s legs. The brunette was giving him time to back out.

“Fine.” Steve said, and leaned down. Bucky’s heartbeat suddenly sped up, because he wasn’t actually expecting for Steve to kiss him. And the blonde was leaning in, slow motion, and Bucky was unsure of what to do, because it was different then all the girls, different than Nat. Because this was _Steve_ , and Bucky had literal dreams about this moment, and it was about to happen right here, in public, in the middle of a party. Their first kiss.

“Wait!” Bucky yelled suddenly. Steve froze,

“What?” he asked, confused. Bucky’s heartbeat picked up,

“Not here. Outside.” He said quickly, before Steve could laugh the whole ordeal off as a joke. The blonde studied Bucky’s face for a moment,

“Alright.” He said eventually. The two weaved their way through the mostly wasted crowd until they were in the back garden, which was like a mini park. Bucky hesitantly walked to the closest tree.

“Why are we here?” Steve asked, following him.

“I don’t want anyone to see,” Bucky said, trying to sound confident. Steve frowned,

“Why not?”

“I…I don’t know,” Bucky admitted, “can we just kiss already?”

“It’s okay if you don’t want to,” Steve said gently, “I’m not trying to pressure you or anything-”

“Just kiss me.” Bucky snapped. Then he gave Steve a sheepish look, “Sorry…I just haven’t done it in a long time.”

“You just kissed Nat,” Steve rolled his eyes. Bucky fidgeted,

“That was different.” He said quietly. He grabbed Steve’s hand and pulled him towards him. Bucky cursed the idea, because now he was trapped between Steve’s super-soldier body and a tree. The brunette looked down, nervous. It was dark outside, and he hoped Steve couldn’t see him blush.

Captain America reached for Bucky’s hands and intertwined their fingers.

“Can I kiss you now?” he asked.

“Yeah, get on with it punk,” Bucky said, but it came out quiet and breathless. Steve smiled, leaned down and pressed his lips to Bucky’s. A shiver went down the brunette’s spine, but the blonde’s lips were gone as quickly as they appeared. Bucky whined,

“Get back here and kiss me properly!” he demanded, reaching for Steve. The blonde ducked his head, laughing, and then began peppering kisses along Bucky’s jaw, he pressed a kiss into the corner of Bucky’s mouth. The brunette’s heart was racing. He chased Steve’s lips, but the hero was just too far to reach. Bucky pouted.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry,” Steve laughed. He let go of Bucky’s hands and placed his hands on the Soldier’s hips. The brunette cupped Steve’s face with his hands and the blonde leaned down. Bucky’s eyes fluttered closed and finally, finally, Steve kissed him.

The kiss was soft and gentle. Steve and Bucky’s lips slid together, and it wasn’t awkward, which was weird, but it felt as though they fit together perfectly. Bucky felt a twist in his stomach, and Steve pushed him harder against the tree, so that their chests were pressed together, their legs tangled. Bucky gasped when Steve bit his lower lip, and the blonde took the opportunity to slide his tongue into the brunette’s mouth. The kiss turned hard and desperate suddenly, and Steve couldn’t keep his hands in one place and they roamed Bucky’s body, his hands sliding up the brunette’s back and then back down to grope his ass, as his tongue explored Bucky’s mouth.

The brunette was a complete mess, moaning and gasping against Steve’s lips, his knees shaking. He was hot all over even though it was mid-November, his body felt like it was on fire wherever Steve touched.

Finally Captain America pulled away because Bucky needed to breathe. The brunette gasped for air as he clutched Steve’s shoulders. He was still shaking.

“Bucky you alright?” Steve murmured, still as close as he could be to Bucky.

“Yes. I-I’m okay...it was just really intense,” he mumbled. Steve smiled and leaned down to kiss Bucky softly again.  


	6. Things will change with time, only in summertime

**Day 6 – Swapping clothes**

 

When Bucky and Steve shared their apartment in Brooklyn, the winter days and nights were cold and hard, and they had to share a bed because Steve would shake too much, and say ‘it’s only because it’s cold’ as they hanged onto each other all night, ignoring their wild heartbeats. Steve would nearly always be sick, his frail form trembling under the covers, and Bucky would work long hours out in the snow.

Summer was different. Summer was filled with a sweaty Bucky coming home from the docks, grinning and drinking a bear. Summer was filled with Steve drawing all day and the two going out on dates with some lovely ladies, summer was filled with dancing and fireworks and swimming in the river. And summer was full of pranks.

Steve and Bucky loved to prank each other – it all started when Steve changed Bucky’s shaving cream to whipped cream. Bucky retaliated two days later by taking a bite out of every cupcake that Steve got from their lovely neighbour. This resulted in an on-going war, that began in June and ended late August. Drawing on each other’s faces with permanent markers, placing fake spiders around the flat (Bucky hated those), switching nice foods to horrible ones, Steve pouring water into a Vodka bottle. It was hilarious and added some fun to the two’s lives. None of it was harmless. Until Bucky decided to chuck _all_ of Steve’s clothes (underwear and everything) into the bath. So when the blonde came back from the shops, dripping wet because it had decided to rain that specific day, he was greeted by every article of his clothing dripping wet.

“Are you _serious_?!” he demanded. Bucky grinned at him,

“Have fun drying that,” he said. Steve looked at him in disbelief. Bucky seemed to notice the blonde’s wet hair and clothes, “why are you wet?”

“Bucky!” Steve yelled, “it’s raining outside!”

“What…?” Bucky ran to the closest window. And sure enough, what was a warm summer rain was quickly turning into a full-blown storm. And all of Steve’s clothes were wet.

“Shit, Stevie. I’m sorry. I didn’t know,” Bucky turned to Steve. The blonde was shivering,

“It’s alright, just calm down,” Steve rolled his eyes and smiled, “you’re one idiot, you know.”

Bucky wasn’t smiling though. He looked really worried.

“Oh my God. Why did I do that?” he groaned to himself.

“Prank Wars?” Steve asked.

“Yeah but…now you’re here and you’re cold and you’ll get sick again,” Bucky sighed, “come on. I’ll borrow you something of mine and then we’ll hang your stuff.”

Steve followed Bucky into their bedroom, dripping water everywhere. The brunette chucked a towel at him and then began rummaging through their shared closet. Bucky began throwing random articles of clothing at Steve – sweatpants, a black jumper, and fluffy socks.

“Go change in the bathroom,” Bucky said in his no-nonsense voice.

“Buck…,” Steve was blushing, “I need…err, underwear?”

Bucky blinked at him, and then casually produced a pair of black boxers. He sniffed at them,

“Clean.” He announced, throwing them at Steve. The blonde caught them with his free hand,

“Gross.” He grumbled, but shuffled to the bathroom.

Bucky went to the kitchen and put the kettle on. He wanted to smack himself, how could he be so stupid! To not even notice the rain…and now all of Steve’s clothes would have to dry. He was an idiot who put his best friend in danger. Bucky just hoped Steve didn’t get a cold.

He was halfway through making himself and Steve some hot chocolate, when the blonde came in.

“I put the wet clothes in the bathtub,” Steve said. Bucky turned towards him, opening his mouth to say _something_ but the words died in his mouth when he saw Steve.

Bucky had always found Steve attractive (of course he’d never tell him that) but seeing him in his clothes made something inside him warm up.

The jumper was so big on Steve that it almost reached his knees, the sleeves falling over his tiny hands. He had to roll the pant legs because they were too long. He looked so fucking adorable and cute, and he was blushing a bit and _he was wearing Bucky’s clothes._

“Bucky?” Steve asked, frowning. The rain hit the roof, making a soft, lulling sound. The chocolate on the counter steamed gently, and Bucky had never felt more at home. “Bucky? Why are you staring? Is there something on my face?”

Bucky strode across the kitchen, gathered Steve up in his arms, and kissed him. Steve froze up, eyes wide. When Bucky made no move to step back, the blonde went limp against the brunette because, alright, kissing Bucky felt kinda nice, like really nice… Bucky kissed Steve roughly, as if he wanted to claim him, and when he broke away so Steve could get some air, he immediately started sucking a hickey into the blonde’s pale neck.

“B-Bucky what are-” Steve’s sentence was cut off by a moan as Bucky found a sensitive spot on his neck. One of the blonde’s hands came up to cover his mouth, and the other reached to pull Bucky away, but somehow ended up tangling in the brunette’s tousled hair.

The brunette licked and sucked at Steve’s neck until the blonde was a panting, shaking mess. Then he leaned up to capture Steve’s lips again. His eyes were darker than usual, and he felt the urge to mark the blonde in front of him, because he wanted him so much to be _his_ …

Bucky seemed to suddenly get his senses back. He stumbled backwards, away from Steve.

“Oh my God, Steve, shit I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me!” he ranted. Steve just stared at him with half-lidded eyes. His lips were swollen and red, a hickey was forming on his neck, the too-big jumper slid off one shoulder, revealing pale, flawless skin. Steve didn’t seem to notice that his legs were shaking.

“Bucky…,” the blonde whined helplessly, reaching for the brunette. Hesitantly, Bucky stepped forward. Steve’s arms wrapped around the brunette’s neck, and he stood on his tiptoes, trying to get Bucky to kiss him again.

“Hey! Stevie, wait up, what-” Bucky tried to think straight, but it was really hard with a blushing, wanting Steve right in front of him.

“Just kiss me,” Steve mumbled, “Please, just kiss me…”

And of course, Bucky being Bucky couldn’t say no, so he reached for the blonde, pulling him close and pressing their mouths together again.

In the end, there were two cold chocolates on the counter, Steve’s clothes were all in the bathtub, and all of Bucky’s clothes were on the floor.


	7. Hey, that sounds like my luck

**Day 7 – Cosplay**

 

Sometimes Steve hated his best friend, Natasha. And sometimes he loved her. And sometimes – both. Like right now.

His roommate decided it would be a brilliant idea to go to the New York Comic Con. She argued that the two didn’t go out much, and anyway, she wanted to see her friend Sam, who was coming down for the event. And because Steve was a sweetheart and couldn’t resist her, he agreed.

He also agreed to let her decide on his costume. She picked the Joker, and the morning before the event the flat was filled with screams as Natasha chased Steve around with a tub of green hair dye,

“It’s not permanent!” she assured, as Steve hid behind the couch, “It’ll wash out!”

“No, no, hell no!” Steve protested, “Nat, don’t do this to me.”

“Come here Rogers,” Natasha glared, “Or I swear I’ll force you to wear my Poison Ivy costume.”

Steve gulped, and in the end, let Natasha dye his hair. They decided to go for the Heath Ledger Joker, so Steve had to go pick up the long purple coat and green vest from the dry cleaners, while Natasha donned her very skimpy Poison Ivy costume and curled her hair.

When Steve got back he had to admit that if he had been straight, he’d totally go for Nat.

***

Steve had an armful of comics (most belonging to Nat) and was just looking through V for Vendetta. Natasha saw her friend, Sam, dressed as Aquaman, and hurried off to say hello, so Steve was left alone among the cosplayers who all acted like they knew eachother. Multiple times certain people came up to him to ask for a picture, including a blonde girl dressed as Harley Quinn, and he couldn’t say no. Still, he was praying for Natasha to come back.

“Are you going to buy that?” a mildly annoyed voice asked. Steve’s head snapped up, and in front of him stood the most gorgeous guy the blonde’s ever seen. His chocolate-brown hair was braided to the side, and he was wearing a tight batman t-shirt.

“Huh?” Steve said intelligently as he continued staring. Damn, the guy had the most amazing brown eyes…like chocolate chips…

“The comic!” the guy said pointedly, “are you going to buy it? You’ve had it for like half an hour!”

“O-Oh,” Steve stammered, snapping out of a daydream that included the guy’s ridiculously pink lips…, “s-sorry.” He passed him the comic. The guy took it and began flicking through, while Steve remained glued to the floor.

“I-I…,” he said. The guy looked up. He didn’t look angry again, “I’m Steve.”

The guy blinked at him, and then smiled this warm, adorable smile, and Steve’s heart melted.

“Oh. James Barnes,” the brunette offered Steve his hand, “just call me Bucky.”

“Alright, Bucky,” Steve grinned, shaking the guys warm hand.

“Nice cosplay, by the way,” Bucky complimented. Steve felt himself blushing a bit.

“Thanks. My friend made me wear it,” he said, “she went as Poison Ivy.”

“I don’t see her,” Bucky said, he tucked the comic book under his arm,

“She ditched me,” Steve rolled his eyes. Bucky laughed a little and it warmed Steve up,

“Aw, that’s sad,” the brunette said, “I’ll keep you company. There’s a Starbucks round the corner.”

Steve’s heart started beating faster. Was Bucky asking him out on a date?!

“Yeah, sure,” he said quickly, “that would be great.” Steve couldn’t keep the grin off of his face.

“Okay, let me just pay for this,” Bucky said, holding up the V for Vendetta comic, also smiling.

Later, Natasha found Steve and Bucky in Starbucks, laughing and joking, and getting weird looks from ‘normally’ dressed people. And when she told Steve to get his ass home, he asked Bucky for his number.


	8. Been a long time coming for the working man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay this isn't really 'shopping' very much :/  
> Anyway, it's also historically inaccurate but who cares.

**Day 8 – Shopping**

Bucky sat at the shabby kitchen table, eating some leftovers. It was late and he had been working a double shift down at the docs. When he got home, Steve was asleep in an awkward position on the couch, obviously waiting up. Bucky had carried him to bed and now here he was.

Lately, Bucky had been staying in work longer, and Steve was worried. The small blonde didn’t know that his best friend had been saving up money to get him a proper Christmas present this year. And yeah, sometimes Bucky’s hands bled because he worked too hard, and he had cuts on his face and dark shadows under his face, but he knew it was all going to a special cause – to make a real Christmas for Steve.

Since the blonde’s ma had died, they weren’t able to afford a proper Christmas. Sometimes the power went out and they ate turkey sandwiches by candlelight, but because they had turkey they would be no Christmas tree or presents. If there were presents, there would be no Christmas dinner. It was a constant loop and Bucky wanted to have a beautiful Christmas before he left for war. With Steve.

***

“I need your help.” Bucky said. Peggy raised an eyebrow. Bucky met her at the bar a few months ago, when they both got their orders. They’ve been good friends since.

“What’s up, Barnes?” Peggy asked. She was in her small flat, dressed in a white shirt and black trousers. It was a nice evening outside, a bit chilly, but nice. December.

“Come shopping with me,” Bucky pleaded, “I have no idea what to get for Steve! And I need to get food for dinner and a Christmas tree…,” Bucky was panicking.

“Hey! Hey!” Peggy said, placing her hands on the boy’s shoulders, “Calm down.”

Bucky sighed and ran a hand down his face,

“I just want it to be perfect y’know,” he said quietly, “I want him to at least have a good memory to hold on to…when I go.”

Peggy smiled sadly,

“I know the feeling,” she said, and reached for her coat, “Alrighty let’s go, Barnes. First the presents. We’ll buy the tree as well…it can wait here so Steve doesn’t suspect anything.”  

Bucky smiled, relieved, and followed Peggy out of the door. The two walked, arm in arm, to the shops, huddling behind their upturned collars. It was cold, which was good – it could mean snow. Bucky knew how much Steve loved snow.

“You really care for him, don’t you?” Peggy asked with a knowing smile. Bucky’s cheeks were red, and he told himself it was because of the chill.

“Of course. He’s my best friend,” he said. Peggy laughed and her breath made a small cloud in front of her face.

“Not like that,” she said, “you love him.” Bucky opened his mouth to protest, “Oh come on. None of that now. Just admit it Bucky.”

Bucky blinked at her. He closed his eyes.

“Fine,” he grumbled eventually, “I love him.”

Peggy laughed again and squeezed Bucky’s arm with her gloved hand.

***

When they got to the shops it was pretty crowded. Women and children and men coming back from work, were all shopping for presents and trees. Christmas was only a week away.

“Right,” Peggy said, “so do you have anything in mind?”

“Um…I don’t know,” Bucky shrugged, “I want to get him…maybe like a jumper or shoes or something so he’s not cold all the time, but I know his paints are running out as well…”

“Alright,” Peggy nodded, “how about we look at paints then?” she offered. Bucky nodded, biting his lip. The two veered through multiple shops, looking at the beautiful things for sale – fashionable clothes, little ‘America’ trinkets, hats and shoes, books…

“Paint!” Bucky said triumphantly, pointing to a shop. It was a little street stand, with an old man behind it. It didn’t seem to be doing too well, as most of the paint and canvases and pencils were unsold. Peggy and Bucky walked over,

“Good evening, sir,” Peggy said with a warm smile, “how much for the paint.”

The man named the price. Bucky and Peggy exchanged a look – the paint wasn’t a fortune but it wasn’t exactly cheap either. Still, Bucky knew he had enough to buy everything he needed, so he paid the man, and watched him bag the paints.

“Alright,” Peggy said as they began walking away. It was getting dark outside, “what about getting that tree, eh?”

The two had to look for a long time to find a tree that wasn’t sold out, and they got to an illegal market that had pine trees imported from Poland. After some time of bargaining, the man selling looked tired and terrified, as Peggy was fuming and threatened to rat him out to the Police.  The man eventually agreed to Bucky’s price (which was fair) for a small tree, and the two walked away happily.

“I’ll get the food before,” Bucky told Peggy as they weaved their way through the market, on the way home, “so it doesn’t go bad.” He carried the tree under his arm, and Peggy held onto the paint.

“Yes, obviously-” Peggy cut off as she saw something, “look.” She pointed to a stand. At first Bucky didn’t understand what she meant, the stand was run by an young girl, and she was selling second-hand books. And then he saw a dozen of hand-knitted scarves hanging behind her. “You think you’ll have enough?” Peggy asked, excited.

“We’ll see,” Bucky said, and they hurried toward the stand.

“How much for the blue scarf?” Bucky asked the girl. She smiled at her,

“How much do you have, sir?” she asked kindly. Bucky counted his money, remembering to save a sum for food, and told the girl. She smiled,

“Give me half of that, and the scarf is yours,” she said.

“B-But…,” Bucky stuttered. Peggy elbowed him. The girl was still smiling, “Thank you,” Bucky said sincerely, handing the girl a little extra than what she asked for. She bagged the scarf for him in brown paper.

“Merry Christmas, good sir, miss,” she smiled at Peggy, passing Bucky the parcel.

“Merry Christmas.”

***

Everything was ready. Bucky hid Steve’s presents at the back of the wardrobe, so the boy wouldn’t find them. Steve was just off to wish Merry Christmas to some of his friends who lived a couple of roads away. He said he wouldn’t be longer than an hour and a half. Bucky pretended he wasn’t feeling well, and told Steve that he’d stay at home. The second Bucky saw the blonde out on the street, he sprinted out of the house and into Peggy’s apartment (she gave him the keys when she went for Christmas to her family in London) so he got in quickly, and made it back before Steve, with the Christmas tree. He pulled out the old decorations he got from his dad, and decorated the tree, then put the fairy lights up around the room. He chucked Steve’s presents under the tree, and then ran to the kitchen.

He thanked his mother for teaching him some cooking, as he prepared the potatoes and turkey. He kept biting his nails or running to the window, checking if Steve was outside yet, that’s how nervous he was. He lit the candles and placed the food on the table and just as he flicked the lights off in the kitchen, the front door opened.

“You won’t believe what-” Steve began to say cheerfully, and then he froze, taking in the display in front of him. “B-Bucky…,” his voice faltered.

“Merry Christmas,” Bucky offered, shrugging a shoulder. Steve hid his face in his hands. Bucky frowned and walked towards him,

“Stevie are you okay?” he asked worriedly, and then noticed Steve’s small shoulders shaking, “Shit, Steve, are you crying? Did I do something wrong?” he gently took Steve’s hands and pulled them away from his face. The blonde’s blue eyes were filled with tears. “Steve?” Bucky asked softly, “Steve what’s wrong.”

Steve sniffed and then let out a little laugh,

“Nothing’s wrong you idiot,” he said, and smiled. He pulled Bucky close and wrapped his skinny arms around the taller boy. Bucky didn’t hesitate, hugging him back, “Thank you  so much Bucky.” Steve murmured.

“It’s okay, just don’t cry,” Bucky replied.

“Sorry,” Steve sniffed again, “I’m just really happy,” he said. Bucky leaned down and pressed their foreheads together.

“Come before the food gets cold, punk.” He said. Steve stuck his tongue out at him, but let Bucky lead him to the table.

The night was spent laughing and joking, Steve saying ‘thank you’ about a hundred times, and then crying some more when Bucky gave him his presents. There was also a lot of hugs, but Bucky couldn’t quite gather up the courage to kiss Steve on the lips, so he just kissed his forehead.

***

Bucky was nice and cosy, sleeping, when Steve clambered up from his own bed and shook Bucky awake.

“What do you want?” Bucky grumbled into the pillow.

“Bucky, wake up!” Steve whispered, his voice full of wonder. Bucky turned around to face him. Steve was standing by his bed, wearing his favourite pyjamas and the scarf Bucky got him, and there was so much happiness in his blue eyes that Bucky had to sit up.

“What is it?” he asked.

“It’s snowing,” Steve whispered. Bucky blinked at him and then stood up, running to the window, Steve on his heels. The two stood with their faces glued to the glass, watching the fat white flakes fall from the sky and colour the world white. “It’s snowing,” Steve repeated. He turned to Bucky and laughed, and Bucky joined in. He wrapped his arms around Steve’s waist and twirled him round, and then he really did kiss him. And Steve kissed back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos? Please? :3


	9. I'm sorry for everything I've done

**Day 9 – Hanging out with friends**

You get different types of friendships. You get friendships like Steve’s and Peggy’s; one made during hard times, and one who lasted through hard times. It’s the kind of friendship where either of them would die for each other, where one of them talked the other through committing suicide to save the nation, and the other held their hand when they’re dying of old age. Peggy’s and Steve’s friendship was like war, hard, and unsteady but full of promise. They loved each other dearly, and their friendship only ended with death.

Then there’s the friendship of all the Avengers. It’s like a massive, dysfunctional family. They all live together, play pranks on each other, annoy each other on a daily basis. They hold hands when they’re coming back from a club, drunk, so nobody gets lost, and have mass sleepovers. They depend on each other like…well, like a family.

And then there’s Steve’s and Bucky’s friendship. It’s friendship that lasted _years._ Bucky’s and Steve’s friendship is the one where they won’t die for each other, because they know that the other one wouldn’t be able to stand the world alone. It’s the kind of friendship that makes you warm inside when you think about it. It’s the kind of friendship that turns into something so much more

***

It had been a wild night, another one of Tony’s parties. All of the Avengers were slowly dying of dehydration and headaches, sprawled randomly in the common area.

“Rum!” Thor bellowed from the floor, lifting one fist in the air, “Water! Rum _and_ water!”  

“You’re not meant to drink alcohol during a hangover,” Tony grumbled. He was sitting at the kitchen counter, on his sixth cup of coffee. Natasha was frying bacon, completely unaffected by the drinking. It had to be the Russian in her.

“Actually,” Bruce, who had been sober the night before, interjected, “drinking beer can actually help the nausea that you-” he cut off when Tony glared at him, “sorry.”

“My wife is going to _kill_ me!” Clint muttered, running around the tower, collecting his things from random corners.

“I already called her,” Natasha smiled, “she said it’s alright if you stay for breakfast.”

Relief appeared on Clint’s face. He walked over to Natasha and kissed her temple,

“Thank you, Nat, you’re amazing.”

“I know,” Natasha said. “Where’s Sam?”

“Puking,” Tony mumbled, “I think Wanda’s with him. She’s puking too.” He looked at his cup and frowned, “can you make me another coffee, Nat?”

“No,” Natasha said briskly, “you can make yourself another coffee, Stark.”

“ _Natashaaa_ ,” Tony whined. The redhead sighed,

“Fine.”

“Water!” Thor begged from the floor. Bruce squatted next to him with a bottle. He even unscrewed the cup for him. Then he watched the blonde fondly as he chugged the water down.

Wanda emerged from the bathroom, still in her dress from last night, looking as pale as ever. Sam was close behind, in Wanda’s pink fluffy bathrobe.

“Never. Again.” He stated.

“Lies,” Wanda smiled, “lies.”

“Where’s Bucky and Steve?” Sam asked, ignoring Wanda’s remark. Natasha shrugged,

“One of their rooms I bet,” she said, “Tony can you go get them?”

Tony just groaned in response. Natasha sighed,

“Barton, look after the food,” she told him, handing him the spatula, and then marched upstairs. She stopped in front of Bucky’s room and took a deep breath, “Steve. Bucky. You best be decent,” she called and opened the door. The room was immaculately clean, and empty. Natasha slammed the door shut and marched to the opposite side of the hallway to Steve’s room, she repeated her warning, and when she got no answer, forced the door open.

Bucky was asleep, snoring softly, mouth open, completely oblivious. Steve sat in bed next to him, the sheets pooled around his waist, smiling gently and brushing through Bucky’s hair. He looked up when Natasha came in and mouthed ‘morning’ at her, still smiling brightly. The redhead rolled her eyes,

“Wake your boyfriend up,” she whispered, “breakfast in five.”

She shut the door and skipped back downstairs. Bruce was looking at her,

“Did you walk in on them again?” he asked innocently. Natasha glared as he and Tony burst out laughing, and high fived over the table. The redhead still remembered the time she had accidently walked in on Steve and Bucky, and they were definitely not _decent,_ in fact, they didn’t even seem to notice her. Later she lamented to it about Clint, washing her eyes out with soap and Jesus, but everyone else thought it was hilarious.

“No. Now shut up,” she commanded, walking back into the kitchen. Clint had a pile of bacon and eggs to the side. He was adding toast to a pile with one hand and preparing coffee and juice with the other. Natasha smiled gratefully at him,

“BREAKFAST!” she yelled, even though most people were downstairs. Loud footsteps echoed from upstairs as Bucky and Steve, still in their pj’s (Steve in sweatpants and Bucky in a long-sleeved shirt and boxers), raced each other. Steve won, mostly because he literally _picked_ Bucky up to place him on a stair above him. “You two are like children,” Natasha sighed as she and Clint carried platters of food into the living room. They placed it on the table as everyone took their seats,

“Don’t mind her, Steve, Bucky,” Tony grinned, “she’s just pissed cuz she interrupted your morning sex.”

Natasha flicked a piece of bacon at Tony, as he and Bruce began to chortle, high-fiving again. Everyone reached for the food, piling it on their plates, except Tony who was on his eighth cup of coffee.

“Does anyone remember anything from last night?” Sam asked, rubbing his forehead.

“Yes,” Bruce said happily, “I remember everything. Want me to tell you?”

Everyone groaned,

“Fine. Go on,” Bucky mumbled. Bruce began retelling the story with a massive smile on his face,

“Alright, so,” he said, “Natasha got into a drinking competition with Maria Hill, and started talking Russian to the CEO of the National Bank,” Bruce thought for a moment, “I think he liked it.”

“What did I say?” Natasha asked.

“That you’ll rip his private parts off and shove them down his throat,” Bruce said, “I don’t think he understood.”

“Eh. Not that bad,” Natasha shrugged and ate her toast.

“Wanda you pretty much passed out straight away, and Sam dragged you around, asking where should we bury you, until Tony came and put you both to bed,” Bruce recalled. Wanda and Sam groaned, “Tony you were actually decent. You didn’t pee anywhere or anything.”

“Oh thank God,” Tony smiled.

“You did tell Pepper that you want to have her babies, though,” Bruce added. Tony winced. “Anyway, Thor got laid…I think. There were loads of girls around him feeling his muscles.”

“I am a God!” Thor said with a broad smile. He didn’t look like a God in a rumpled shirt, drinking juice out of a straw.

“Clint wanted to fly a helicopter,” Bruce continued, “but Steve stopped him.”

“Thanks, buddy,” Clint patted Steve on the shoulder.

“And then he dragged Bucky into the helicopter and you two made out until someone kicked you out,” Bruce finished.

“Oh my God,” Steve groaned into his hands, while Bucky smiled and casually slung an arm around the back of his chair.

“Sounds like a great night,” he said, “and what about you Bruce? What did you do?”

“I witnessed all of it.” Bruce pulled a face, “and dragged all of you home.”

“Did we hold hands when we crossed the road?” Wanda asked.

“Wanda, the party was here…”

 


	10. I took a photograph of me when I was only nineteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I disappeared. I know. I'm sorry.

**Day 10 – Love Confessions**

The first time Bucky told Steve that he loved him was when they were eight. Little Steve was brought into the Barnes household, crying and shaking and asking for his ma, who was dead. Bucky’s mother asked him to take Steve up into his room, give him some tea, and put him to bed. Bucky was unsure of what to do – most of the time Steve was feisty and loud and sarcastic, and now here he was, a complete mess. But Bucky couldn’t blame him.

The brunette took his friend to his room, where he had made a pillow fort, and laid down on the covers strewn over the floor, listening to Steve’s sobs and holding his hand. Eventually, the blonde’s cries died down to sniffles and hiccups. He didn’t say anything, but when Bucky turned he could still see tears in his red rimmed, blue eyes.

“It’s alright you know,” Bucky lisped. One of his front teeth had just fallen out. He held Steve’s hand firmly, “It’s alright now, you can stop crying.”

“B-But,” Steve’s bottom lip trembled, “my ma’s gone.”

“I know. I’m sorry,” Bucky said, like he heard his mom say. He pulled Steve into a fierce hug, “But you have me and my ma now. And she loves you. And I love you.”

Steve burst out crying again, and he didn’t stop for a long, long time…

***

The second time happened when they were thirteen. Steve was being bullied in the backyard of the school house by some fifteen year olds. Of course, Bucky ran to help him, and he also got beat up. Now the two trudged home miserably, heads hung low, rubbing the bruises forming on their skin. Steve kicked a stone off the pavement angrily. Bucky sighed,

“Why do ya always have to pick fights with bigger boys, Steve?” he asked. Steve shrugged one shoulder, embarrassed,

“They started it,” he mumbled, chin pressed into his chest, hand in the pockets of his suspenders, “and anyway, you didn’t have to come save me Buck.”

“Of course I did,” Bucky smiled brilliantly even though his eye was purple, “I’m responsible for your punk ass.”

“Jerk.” Steve smiled and pushed Bucky playfully. The brunette stumbled sideways, laughing. The two stopped by someone’s house, and stared at each other. Bucky’s face softened,

“I’ll always fight for you. You know I love you.” He said. Steve frowned, and his cheeks tinted pink because he _knew_ Bucky didn’t mean it in _that way._ But a boy could hope.

“I’ll race you home,” the blonde said, and took off sprinting before Bucky could respond. Of course the brunette let him win.

***

The third time happened when Bucky and Steve got their first apartment together. It was a tiny, cold flat in downtown, but it was _theirs._ Bucky’s ma let them take her old, floral couch to add some color to the bleak interior, and Steve put his paintings up on the walls so it looked homey. Bucky even motivated some of their friends to come and help them paint the walls – kitchen was white, their room blue, the living room cream.

It was late in the night and the two boys were finishing painting the ceiling in their room. Steve was balanced on Bucky’s shoulders, the ladder laid broken in the corner.

“Done?” Bucky asked.

“Almost,” Steve stuck his tounge out and painted over the last stripe with a graceful swipe of his hand. “Done!” he said happily, and then casually stepped off of Bucky’s shoulders. The brunette caught him easily and before Steve could fully appreciate his friend’s warm body, the brunette placed him on the floor.

The two boys looked around their apartment, broad smiles on their faces. Bucky put a brotherly arm around Steve and hugged him into his side,

“I love you,” he said, grinning at the blonde. Steve ignored the ache in his heart and rolled his eyes fondly.

***

The fourth time Bucky said it was when Steve was having a heart attack, clutching desperately at his thin nightshirt, curled up on his bed. Bucky knelt on the floor next to him, Steve’s asthma pump in his hand.

“Come on Stevie, work with me,” Bucky said, trying to keep the desperation out of his voice. He tugged Steve upwards, so the boy was sitting up, breathing rapidly. “Stevie, calm down…,” Bucky whispered, “Breathe with me.”

“I-I can’t,” Steve sobbed, free hand curling into Bucky’s hand. It looked like his heart hurt.

“Deep breath, Steve,” Bucky said softly. He pressed his hand over Steve’s hand and heart. He took in a deep breath and Steve followed, but let it out way too quickly. “It’s alright Stevie. Again. And wait until I tell you to let it out, okay?”

Steve nodded shakily, his tiny chest heaving. Bucky sucked in air, Steve did as well. They made eye contact as they held their breath, then slowly, slowly, Bucky let his breath out, and Steve let his out in a gush, red in the face. He was still panicking, eyes shining with unshed tears.

“It’s alright, Stevie,” Bucky said soothingly. “It’s all okay. I love you. Breathe with me.”

Steve’s eyes widened, his breath caught in his throat as he stared at Bucky. His breathing slowed. Bucky passed him his pump, Steve took it gratefully.

“You scared me there,” Bucky admitted with a smile.

“S-Sorry,” Steve said hoarsely.

“It’s alright Stevie,” Bucky messed up the blonde’s hair, “It’s alright.”

***

“Steve.” Bucky said desperately, he sounded so heart broken. Steve faced the window, arms crossed over his chest, lower lip trembling. He couldn’t bare for Bucky to see him so close to tears, “Steve. Please just look at me.”

“Just go.” Steve said quietly, voice wavering. Bucky stepped towards him,

“I’m sorry. You know I’m sorry.” He said. Steve whirled around to face him, hands clenched in fists,

“Go on!” he yelled angrily, eyes watery, “Go to your beloved army! You’re a soldier now, then _go._ Go on and leave me!”

“Steve…”

“Don’t.” Steve flinched away from the hand Bucky suddenly extended toward him. _It hurt so much._ Bucky stood there, tears in his eyes, looking devastated, wearing his brand new uniform. He should be smiling, Steve should be walking him to the station. Instead, the blonde was being selfish and ruining the day for Bucky. But he couldn’t act differently, not when Bucky was leaving him all by himself. “You promised,” Steve hissed at him, “you promised to take care of me.”

“I’m trying,” Bucky said, “that’s why I’m leaving. So I can earn money. So we can keep this place,” he waved his hand around. Steve looked at the colourful walls, and remembered the day that he and Bucky painted the ceiling. The brunette had said ‘I love you’ back then. He didn’t mean it. He never meant it.

“I could get a job. Down at the docks,” Steve said, suddenly desperate to keep Bucky _right there._ “You don’t have to go.”

“But I want to.” Bucky admitted quietly. Steve froze, “I want to be a soldier, Steve. I want to be brave, I want you to be proud of me.”

“ _Proud?!”_ Steve shouted, “Bucky I want you to be _alive!”_

“I’m sorry.” Bucky was looking at the floor. A tear rolled down Steve’s cheek. He stepped away.

“Just go,” he said hollowly. Bucky looked at him, eyes red rimmed.

“I love you.” He said.

“Leave.”

Bucky walked out of the door.

***

For six months, Steve lived alone. He tried to get into the army, again and again, and every time he heard the same thing, ‘We’re sorry but your medical condition is insufficient.’

For six months, Steve cried himself to sleep, laying in Bucky’s bed, wearing one of the brunette’s shirts, pretending that he was bustling around in the kitchen, instead of being out in the cold, hard war.

For six months, Steve dreamed about finally becoming a soldier. He imagined getting put in the same place as Bucky, the brilliant smile on the brunette’s face when he saw him again.

Christmas came and went, leaving Steve alone in the freezing apartment, with the electricity out, sobbing into Bucky’s pillow.

And then, six months later, a knock came to the flat’s door. Steve crawled out of his dark room and walked over to the door. He caught sight of himself in one of the mirrors – his hair had grown long, curling around his ears, there were dark circled under his eyes, his skin was paler than ever. He looked like a pile of bones.

The blonde walked up to the door and pulled it open. He expected a lost stranger, someone selling something, a beggar.

He didn’t expect Bucky, grinning from ear-to-ear, with a five o-clock shadow and a scar on his jaw. He was dressed in his uniform, a badge pinned to the flaps, a bag was slung carelessly over his shoulder. Steve’s mouth went dry.

“B-Bucky?” he asked in disbelief. Maybe he was still asleep.

“Surprise,” Bucky grinned, “sorry I couldn’t make it for Christmas.”

Steve threw himself at the brunette with a warning, but the soldier still caught him. Steve clung onto him fiercely,

“Hey to you too,” Bucky laughed, his arms coming to wrap around Steve’s waist. The blonde started crying.

“I-I thought you’d never come back,” he sobbed.

“Of course I came back,” Bucky said soothingly. He closed the door behind him, “I love you.”

Steve’s heart clenched and he stepped away from Bucky.

“Stop saying that Buck,” he murmured. It was weird – Steve though after Bucky came back the pain would stop, but it only got worse. Did Bucky meet someone when he was away? A lovely dame, a nurse? When would he be going back? Was he _in_ love with someone?

Steve wanted Bucky to be in love with him, and every time the soldier said ‘I love you’ it was like a dagger to the heart, because Steve knew that _Bucky didn’t love him like that_.

“Steve what’s wrong?” Bucky put the bag down, “You don’t look so well. Are you sick?” He tried to place his hand on Steve’s forehead, to check his temperature, but the blonde moved away. Bucky frowned, “What’s wrong Steve? Aren’t you happy to see me?” Steve didn’t reply, just stared at the carpet, hugging himself. Bucky ran a hand through his hair, frustrated, “Are you still angry that I left?”

“No.” Steve mumbled.

“Then what’s wrong?” Bucky sighed. Steve didn’t reply. Bucky stepped closer to him again, and took it as a good sign when Steve didn’t move away, “I thought about you when I was away. Every day.”

“Don’t say that,” Steve pleaded, trembling. It was cold.

“Steve what’s wrong?” Bucky repeated, frustrated, “Why are you acting like this?”

“Because you keep saying it!” Steve whispered, getting chocked up, “You keep saying that you love me.”

Bucky frowned,

“I do love you,” he said like it was the most obvious thing ever, “is it really that wrong?”

“No it’s not wrong,” Steve laughed humourlessly, “but you don’t _get it.”_

“I don’t get what?” Bucky asked. Steve bit his lip, “Stevie just talk to me. I came back after six months of war and I just want to see my best friend.”

“That’s just it!” Steve yelled, “I don’t _want_ to be your best friend!”

A beat passed. Silence. Bucky looked nervous unsure. Steve’s heart thumped in his chest,

“Are…d-did I do something?” Bucky stuttered finally, “Did I do s-something? Did I do something and now you h-hate me…”

“I don’t hate you!” Steve groaned, “God why do you have to be so daft.”

“Steve what are you trying to say?” Bucky asked, confused.

Steve mumbled something.

“What?” the brunette asked, “I didn’t hear that.”

Steve took a deep, shaky breath.

“I love you.”

Bucky blinked at him, then raised an eyebrow.

“Alright…well, I love you too?” he offered. Steve groaned in frustration,

“You don’t get it do you?!” he demanded, “I don’t love you like a brother or like a best friend I love you like…like…” he broke off, unsure of how to end, cheeks blazing red. Bucky walked up to him, wrapped his arms around the blonde’s waist, and kissed him. The kiss was quick, chaste, but it left Steve wide eyed and breathless.

“I love you too,” Bucky said with  a fond smile. Steve’s hand travelled upwards, his palm shaking as he hesitantly pressed it to Bucky’s face, as if checking if he was real.

“I’m really glad you’re back,” he mumbled, eyes filling with tears again.

“Me too.” Bucky smiled and kissed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> COMMENTS  
> KUDOS  
> PLEASE  
> I AM SAD  
> MAKE ME HAPPY WITH YOUR LOVELY COMMENTS  
> YOU LOVELY PEOPLE  
> Thankyou to wifey and bloatedblond for their awesome comments :)


	11. Oh, I'm going to mess this up oh, this is just my luck

**Day 11 – Getting a pet**

“Bucky.” Steve said, and it sounded like a warning. Bucky blinked at him, playing innocent.

“Yes, Steve?” he grinned, a dimple appearing in his unshaved cheek. Steve sighed. He was crouching on the floor of the pet shop, next to a cage with a golden retriever. Bucky had an armful of a grumpy looking, grey cat. Steve stood up,

“What’s that?” he pointed to the cat. Bucky shrugged one shoulder,

“It’s a cat,” he said as if it wasn’t obvious, “his name’s Captain,” Bucky looked at Steve with his puppy dog eyes (how ironic), “do you…like him?”

Steve ran a hand through his hair in frustration,

“I thought we agreed on a dog, buck.”

Bucky pulled a sour face and cradled Captain closer. The cat closed its eyes and began purring,

“Yeah but cats are so much better,” Bucky explained, “remember? There were so many cats in Brooklyn back in the days…”

“Bucky, there were no cats in Brooklyn,” Steve winced, “there were stray dogs.”

Bucky glared accusingly at Captain,

“Dammnit,” he grumbled to himself, and then he sighed sadly, “so we’re not getting Captain?”

Steve smiled at him gently,

“No. Of course we can get him.”

“But…,” Bucky bit his lip, “you wanted a dog.”

“Let’s get both,” Steve said easily. He came up to Bucky and ran his knuckled down Captain’s back gently. The cat glared at him, but didn’t hiss or jump away, which Steve took as a good sign, “Tony will have a fit.”

“I know,” Bucky grinned again, and it warmed Steve’s heart. The brunette leaned over and pecked Steve on his cheek, Captain nestled between them. “What will you call the dog?” Bucky looked over at the Golden Retriever. The dog had his tongue out and was staring at the two men, excited.

“It’s a she, I think,” Steve said, “So maybe…Winter?”

***

When Steve and Bucky came into the Avenger’s tower, their new pets in tow, they were greeted by a fuming Tony Stark, yelling at Clint, who was running around the table to prevent the inventor from catching him. Bruce was observing him worriedly.

“What’s up with them?” Steve asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Um, Clint got a hamster,” Bruce said nervously, pulling his sleeved over his hands. Bucky and Steve exchanged a look,

“Fuck,” Bucky breathed. Tony’s eyes snapped towards them, bright and angry.

“Is that a cat?!” he demanded. Winter padded in casually, “IS THAT A DOG?!”


	12. Round and round I won’t run away this time

**Chapter 12 – Making Out**

 

Steve looked over at Bucky nervously. The brunette was drinking a beer and smoking a cigarette, sitting on the heated balcony floor next to Steve, his bare feet hanging over the edge. It was a warm summer evening, the kinds Bucky liked the most.

“What’s wrong Stevie?” Bucky asked, snubbing out his cigarette. Steve looked away guiltily.

“N-Nothing,” he stuttered. His best friend frowned and nudged him with his shoulder,

“Did something happened?” Bucky inquired.

“No…, it’s just…well,” Steve blushed, “I…I kissed a girl today.”

A happy broad smile spread over Bucky’s lips, but his eyes looked…sad?

“That’s great Stevie!” Bucky said and reached over to ruffle his comrade’s hair. “How was it?”

Steve sighed uneasily.

“Wet,” he pulled a face. He nibbled on his lip.

“…and?” Bucky prompted. Steve glanced over at him,

“She said…she said I was bad at it,” he admitted. Bucky laughed merrily like it was the most fantastic thing he heard all day. Steve glared at him, “What are you laughing at, jerk!?” he asked.

“Of course you’ll be bad, Stevie,” Bucky snickered, “it was your first kiss!”

“No it wasn’t!” Steve huffed.

“It was too!” Bucky stuck his tounge out at Stevie and finished his beer. Steve got to his feet and walked inside their shabby flat. Bucky followed, still chuckling.

“Cut it out!” Steve grumbled, “Who was _your_ first kiss?”

Bucky thought for a second,

“Ruth Brown,” he said eventually, “remember her? She went to second grade with us.”

Steve gaped at him,

“Your first kiss was _Ruth Brown?!”_ he exclaimed. Bucky shrugged and started washing the dishes. Steve pulled himself up to sit on the counter and watched Bucky do his chore.

“So…,” Steve continued after a moment, “how many girls have you kissed, then?”

“Oh, Steve, if only I remembered,” Bucky laughed. Steve glared, “Alright, fine,” Bucky rolled his eyes, “well, there was Ruth. Then Angela, Sophie, Ann. Daisy, Eva, Katie.”

“Holy cow, that’s a load of girl,” Steve said wide eyed.

“Yup,” Bucky grinned, “that’s me. Bucky Barnes, kissing girls since 1917.”

Steve didn’t laugh, just watched Bucky chuckling along happily, washing the dishes. The blonde fiddled nervously with the bottom of his shirt, trying to gather up the courage to ask. Bucky finished the last dirty cup, and wiped his hands on the kitchen towel. He glanced at Steve, who was staring at the floor, bright red.

“C’mon Steve,” Bucky sighed, “tell me what’s wrong.”

“Could you teach me?” Steve blurted before he could stop himself.

“Teach you what?” Bucky asked.

“H-How to kiss,” Steve mumbled.

“You want me to teach you how to kiss?” Bucky asked, shocked. Steve winced.

“Nevermind.” He said quickly, making a move to get off the counter and go die in a hole somewhere. However Bucky moved to stand in between his legs, hands on either side of the blonde’s slim hips. He was smirking.

“Alright.” He said.

“Alright?” Steve breathed. Bucky nodded. “S-So what do I do?” he asked uncertainly. Bucky took his hands gently and placed them on his own shoulders. Steve’s small hands automatically fisted into the material of Bucky’s shirt. The brunette lightly wrapped his muscular arms around Steve’s waist. With the blonde sitting on the counter, the two were almost the same height, which definitely helped. Bucky smirked at Steve and then leaned forward gently slotting their lips together. Steve let out a chocked sound and jumped away. Bucky raised an eyebrow at him,

“If this is how you acted with that girl then I’m not surprised that she thought you were a bad kisser,” he said.

“S-Sorry,” Steve mumbled, beet red, “I just don’t know what to do.”

Bucky’s arms tightened around his waist, pulling him closer.

“Just relax,” the brunette murmured, “close your eyes,” he instructed, and Steve did so, his long lashes casting dark shadows on his pale skin. Bucky couldn’t help one of his hands travelling upwards to cup Steve’s cheek. The blonde leaned into his hand, which Bucky took as a good sign when he leaned in again for another, quick, chaste kiss. Steve barely had time to register the soft lips on his and feel the rough stubble against his cheek before Bucky was pulling away. Steve opened his eyes.

“You alright?” Bucky asked quietly. Somehow the atmosphere in their tiny kitchen had changed from light-hearted to more intimate. It made Steve feel hot all of a sudden. He gave Bucky a little nod, not trusting himself to speak.

“Alright,” Bucky smiled. “Just…kind of go with it.” He advised.

“Mhm,” Steve hummed. He just wanted Bucky to kiss him again. The brunette shifted forward and pressed their lips together once more, and Steve’s heart fluttered. The kiss was soft and slow, Bucky moved his lips against Steve’s and the blonde tried to copy his actions.

The lights flickered and went out. Steve gasped and pulled away.

“What the hell?” Bucky grumbled.

“B-Blackout,” Steve said shakily. Bucky pulled away and Steve almost whined at the sudden loss of heat against his front. It was pitch black in the kitchen. Bucky stumbled around, opening drawers as Steve got off the counter. His legs were shaking. Bucky produced a candle and lit it with a match. The kitchen was filled with a soft, warm glow. The brunette turned around,

“Well, I better go see what…,” his voice faltered as he look at Steve. The blonde’s lips were slightly red, his cheeks flushed. He was clutching the edge of his shirt nervously, and standing there looking so, so…

Bucky strode across the room and pressed Steve against the counter.

“B-Bucky?” Steve asked shakily.

“The lesson’s not over,” Bucky growled, and the crashed their lips together. Steve gasped as the brunette gripped his hips. The blonde knew that there would be bruises in the morning, but then Bucky’s warm tongue slid into his mouth and at that moment all thought flew out of his brain and Steve melted against the taller boy, his hands tangling in the brunette’s hair.

Bucky kissed him with a raw passion, completely claiming Steve’s mouth. His big, warm hands travelled up and down the blonde’s skinny frame, squeezing his arse or pressing against the small of his back. At one moment, Bucky hoisted the blonde up and pushed him back onto the counter, and Steve couldn’t help the shiver that ran through him. He pulled away,

“B-Bucky wait-” he gasped, but the brunette just kissed him again, desperately, like he couldn’t get enough of the tiny blonde. Steve couldn’t do much except cling onto the taller boy in front of him, his legs wrapped around Bucky’s waist. Bucky broke away so Steve could breathe and attacked his neck, sucking bruises into the pale skin, kissing and licking and marking.

“ _Bucky_ ,” Steve whined, eyes squeezed closed. He couldn’t take it, it was too hot, too much, too fast…

The brunette captured Steve’s lips in his again, in a bruising kiss. Steve knew he should push Bucky away before the kiss escalated, but he couldn’t. It felt so good, having Bucky right there, kissing him like that.

So he let Bucky snog him senseless, leaving Steve a helpless, shivering, moaning mess.

When Bucky eventually pulled away, the two were breathing hard, and the candle had almost burned out, Bucky’s shirt was gone, and Steve’s one was unbuttoned. The brunette stared at the smaller boy, as Steve tried to catch his breath, his lips swollen, hair messed up and eyes dark and half-lidden.

“God, _Steve_ ,” Bucky groaned, voice hoarse, and rested his forehead against Steve’s bare shoulder. The sleeve slid further down his arm, revealing more of his pale skin, but Steve didn’t care. Bucky peppered his exposed shoulder with feather-light kisses.

“I lied,” Steve mumbled.

“Hmm?”

“I l-lied. About kissing a girl,” the blonde clarified. Bucky pulled away and looked at him, frowning.

“Why?” he asked, brushing Steve’s sweaty hair from his forehead.

“I wanted to have an excuse to get you to kiss me,” Steve whispered, looking away. Bucky smile.

“I was your first kiss,” he said in awe. Steve looked at him shyly,

“Well…yes.”

Bucky grinned and kissed Steve again, gently this time. The candle went out.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos pretty please!


	13. Been dreaming of this since a child, I’m on top of the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments pleaseeeeee

**Day 13 – Road trips/Camping**

 

Bucky hummed to himself as his eyes scanned the map in front of him. The stupid cowboy har was perched on top of his messy locks, making him look ridiculous, especially paired with his sharp-pattered shirt.

“You know there’s a GPS in the car, right?” Steve asked, raising an eyebrow and sipping on banana milkshake. Bucky glared at him,

“No!” he said, “we will do this the old fashioned way and it will be romantic, goddammit.”

Steve couldn’t help the smile that spread on his face,

“Alright, alright,” he laughed, “but let’s get back on the road, we need to get there by nightfall.”

“Fine,” Bucky grumbled, “I think I know which way to go!” he suddenly brightened up and stuffed the map into his pocket. “Come on!” he exclaimed, and grabbed Steve’s hand, tugging him back into their beat up old van.  Bucky was giddy with excitement as he started the car, a bright grin on his face.

“Seatbelts!” Steve remembered as Bucky pulled out of the gas station parking lot. The blonde leaned across his boyfriend’s lap and grabbed the belt, pulling it tightly across the brunette’s body.

“Thanks, punk,” Bucky said, without really thinking about it. It made Steve smile, even as a wave of nostalgia hit him. He pressed a quick kiss to Bucky’s dimpled cheek.

***

The car’s engine stopping woke Steve up from his nap. It was dark outside and Bucky was cursing.

“Huh?” Steve asked, suddenly alert, “what’s wrong?!”

“The engine just died,” Bucky explained, “Bloody hell. I’m calling Stark.” A blue light illuminated the inside of the car as Bucky fought with his phone, dialling Tony’s number.

“Wait!” Steve all but smacked the phone out of Bucky’s hand. The brunette blinked at him, “Um…maybe we could just call tomorrow. I…,” he bit his lip, “I’m kinda tired and I bet the stars look nice here…wherever we are, and I really don’t mind staying the night here.

“You don’t?” Bucky asked, surprised, “But the resort…”

“We’ll get there tomorrow,” Steve assured, opening his door, “now c’mon.”

Bucky scrambled out of the van just as Steve pulled out the covers, laying it on the roof of the car.

“Whaaat are you doing?” Bucky asked, looking up at him. Steve grinned, above him the half-moon shone brightly, and the sky was illuminated by thousands of stars. Bucky’s breath caught.

“Nothing,” Steve winked at him and offered him one of his hands, “you coming or what?”

“Y-Yeah,” Bucky quickly grabbed Steve’s hand, and the man easily pulled him up onto the van. Bucky stumbled a bit, but Steve caught him. Instead of letting go, the blonde held the brunette in his arms.

“I’m really glad we did this,” he whispered, resting his forehead against Bucky’s. The brunette smiled and closed his eyes,

“We’re meant to be looking at stars,” he whispered. Steve kissed him gently.

“I’d much rather be looking at you.”


	14. So pray for me brother, I need redemption

**Day 14 - Genderbender**

“STARK!” Steve screamed. Tony casually walked into the room, a cup of coffee in his hand, a glare on his face. The rest of the avengers crowded in the doorway behind him.

“What. The. Hell?” Clint asked, eyes wide.

“Oops.” Tony shrugged.

“Oops?!” Steve bellowed, “ _OOPS?!”_

It was meant to be threatening and probably would’ve been if it wasn’t for the fact that Steve was no longer a tall, muscular, strong man. Instead, he was a lean, fuming, furious girl.

“What the-” Bucky walked in and his step faltered. Steve turned and glared at him. Buck stared, then burst out laughing. Steve’s glare intensified.

“Oh my God,” Bucky wheezed, clutching his stomach. Natasha watched him, and a giggle escaped her. Soon all of the Avengers followed suit, crying with laughter.

“Stop it!” Steve screeched, “What is this?! Stark, fix it!”

“I’m sorry, I did some experimenting with Mjolnir and eh,” Tony smiled sheepishly, “Bruce.”

Steve whirled on Bruce, who looked terrified.

“YOU!” Steve fumed, jabbing a slender finger at Bruce’s chest. His anger intensified when he realized that he had to look up at him, “ _Fix it_.”

“S-Sorry, Steve,” Bruce held his hands up in surrender, “I…um, it should wear off…”

“When?” Steve demanded.

“…in a couple of hours.”

“IN A COUPLE OF HOURS?!”

“Aw, c’mon Stevie,” Bucky was grinning, “this isn’t bad. Think of all the free drinks you’ll get tonight.”

“Shut up!” Steve snapped, but the anger left him…her. She deflated. Sam came over and put a comforting arm around Steve’s shoulders,

“It’s alright mate,” he said, “at least you’re hot.”

“ _Sam_.”

“Sorry, sorry,” Sam moved away sheepishly, “come on,” he grabbed Bucky’s arm, “let’s leave the ladies alone.” He winked at the fuming Steve.

***

Natasha finished applying Steve’s lipstick as Wanda played with her freshly-curled hair.

“Is this really necessary?” Steve whined, “can’t I just sit this one out?”

“No,” Natasha said sternly, pocketing the lipstick. She was wearing a tight leather dress, “all the Avengers are meant to be there.”

“And how are you going to explain some random blonde with you?” Steve snorted.

“So,” Wanda changed the topic, “since you’re now a girl, are you lesbian?” she was grinning. Steve pulled a face,

“Ew. No.” He said, “I like guys.”

“So you’re straight?” Wanda inquired.

“Yes. No. Wait,” Steve stuttered, “I…I’m not straight I’m gay.”

“Sooo…you’re lesbian?”

“No!” Steve yelled exasperated. Wanda and Natasha laughed.

“Come on,” Nat pulled a sulking Steve up, “check yourself out and meet us downstairs.” She said cheerfully, and then she and Wanda disappeared through the door, chatting in Russian. Steve sighed and turned to the mirror, and froze.

First he had to get used to being a massive, bulky man instead of a sickly, thin boy, and now he looked like…this.

Hesitantly, Steve ran a hand through his shoulder-length, dark blonde hair which curled nicely around his face. He had high cheek bones and no moustache, his face was smooth and coated in foundation (yuck), his lips were bright red, and something smoky circled his blue eyes, making them pop. Natasha forced his now feminine and slightly-muscular build into one of her red dresses. It hugged all of Steve’s new curves, exposed some of his chest (yuck, boobs) and ended above his knees. Steve uselessly tried to tug the short thing down, but every time he did so, more of his cleavage would be exposed. He groaned.

“Yup, definitely gay.

***

It took Steve almost two hours and half a bottle of vodka to find Bucky. The brunette was dressed in a tight black shirt, and was hiding in one of the dark corners, drinking a can of coke.

“Bucky!” Steve said, relieved. He was so tired of guys hitting on him. Bucky looked slightly panicked when he saw the blonde,

“Oh. H-Hey Steve,” he said, forcing a smile. Steve frowned and pressed closer to his boyfriend.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, “are you alright?”

“I, um, yeah,” Bucky was blushing, a hand on Steve’s shoulder, as if to keep him-her, whatever, where he was.

“Bucky…,” Steve glanced at the hand on his shoulder. He bit his red lip, “Is…is it because of how I look?”

“What is?” Bucky asked gently.

“The way you’re looking at me,” Steve swayed on his feet, the alcohol hitting him suddenly, “like you don’t want me near you.”

Bucky sighed and ran a hand through his long-ish brown hair.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured, a hand cupping Steve’s face, “It’s just…I don’t know. I don’t want people to think I’m cheating on you.”

“But me is me,” Steve frowned, confused. Bucky cracked a smile,

“They don’t know that,” he quickly looked around and then planted a sweet kiss on Steve’s lips. He made a face, “You taste like lipstick.”

“Fine,” Steve grumbled, “I’ll go look for Natasha so we can do some dirty dancing. You stay here and be a killjoy.”

“Steve…,” Bucky pouted. Steve grinned and pressed a quick kiss to Bucky’s cheek.

“It’s alright,” he said, “boobs gross me out too.”

***

Despite this, Bucky was still the small spoon later in bed, and Steve’s girlish figure curled around him. He could almost ignore the boobs…

***

Steve didn’t remember falling asleep with the gorgeous, long haired brunette. When he woke up, red lights flashed in his brain, and he jumped away from the future lying in bed with him.

“What…,” the girl mumbled, sitting up and rubbing her eyes. One of her arms was metal, a red star painted on her shoulder. Steve blinked,

“Buck?” He asked, stepping closer to the bed. The girl looked over at him, looking tired.

“Who else would it be?” he asked. Then frowned, “what the hell happened to my voice?”

“Er, Buck…,” Steve said. He glanced at himself in the mirror, and sighed with relief. At least he was back to normal.

Just then the door burst open and Tony and Natasha spilled inside. Steve gasped.

Natasha’s chest was bare, and completely flat and muscled, she wore baggy sweatpants, her red hair, now shorter, was a messy on her head, and a red beard began to appear on her chin. She was almost as tall as Steve. Or he. Because Natasha was now a man. Tony, on the other hand, was the opposite.

He wore a baggy STARK INDUSTRIES top and nothing else, his hair was down to his chin, choppy and messy, his glasses pushed up to keep the bangs out of his eyes.

“We have a problem.” He said solemnly.


	15. It’s not a picture perfect life

**Day 15 – Morning Rituals**

Steve woke up to the delicious smell of breakfast wafting through the apartment and an empty bed. It was Saturday – Bucky’s pay day, and that meant that he treated Steve to a _proper_ breakfast, even though Steve always told him not to.

The blonde struggled out of bed, and his feet hit the warm floor. He wore one of Bucky’s shirts, and it was too big on him, reaching his mid-thighs. Sunlight streamed in through the window. Summer was finally here. Steve enjoyed the warmth as he padded into the kitchen.

Bucky stood at the stove in nothing more than plaid pyjama bottoms, humming a happy tune. Steve let his eyes wonder over his boyfriend’s muscular back for a moment.

“Oh! You’re up!” Bucky turned to face him with a grin on his face. There was a one day stubble on his face. He was meant to shave it yesterday but, ehem, Steve got him a bit distracted…

“Morning.” Steve said with a lazy smile. He still hadn’t woken up properly. Bucky rested his hands on Steve’s hips and leaned down to kiss the smaller boy. Steve smiled as Bucky’s lips travelled down his neck, peppering his skin with soft kisses. The blonde could feel his boyfriend’s stubble rubbing against his sensitive.

“C’mon Buck,” Steve laughed and tried to push Bucky away. The brunette caught his wrists and held them. Steve laughed again, while Bucky continued assaulting his neck with feather-light kisses, “Bucky you’ll burn the breakfast.”

Bucky pulled away grudgingly and let go of Steve’s wrist. Steve stared at him, and his breath caught caught. He stood in _his_ kitchen, with _his_ boy who loved him unconditionally. Steve’s heart threatened to burst with the sudden surge of happiness.

“Morning.” He repeated breathlessly.

“Morning, beautiful,” Bucky grinned, eyes twinkling. He kissed Steve again briefly and then returned back to the stove, leaving Steve smiling in the middle of the kitchen.

During their hearty breakfast, the two argued over stupid things and joked.

“Your hair’s getting long,” Steve said, chewing some toast, “you’ll look like a girl soon enough, and then I won’t have to lie about being straight.” He joked. Bucky stuck his tongue out at him,

“Whatever, punk,” he sipped his orange juice, “but you’re right. You’ll have to cut my hair today.”

“Have to?” Steve raised an eyebrow and collected the plates. He put them in the sink, “I don’t have to do anything, Mr Barnes.”

Bucky came up behind him and tried to wrap his arms around Steve’s waist, but the blonde ducked.

“I’ll cut your hair if you catch me!” he yelled, running around the table. Bucky grinned and followed him. Steve screamed as Bucky chased after him, running into the bedroom and ducking over the bed. He was laughing as Bucky tried to grab him. Thanks to being so small, Steve got away easily, and led Bucky into the living room. Bucky followed him, but Steve circled round the couch, getting away.

“Aw c’mon Stevie,” Bucky laughed, trying to grab him, “Don’t be such a tease.”

Steve was grinning, out of breath.

“Am I too much for you Bucky?” he joked. Bucky lunged and managed to grab Steve’s hand. He tugged him roughly towards him, and ignoring Steve’s laughing protests, wrapped his arms around the blond securely.

“No you’re not too much,” he said, kissing the tip of Steve’s nose, “You’re just enough.”

Steve tried to wiggle his way out of Bucky’s arms, but the brunette didn’t let him get away. He kissed him and Steve automatically kissed back, relaxing in Bucky’s arms. The blonde sighed happily and Bucky smiled against his lips. He broke away,

"I love you," the brunette murmured, brushing Steve's bangs out of his face. 

"I love you too," Steve smiled. 

“Now come and cut my hair.”

Steve rolled his eyes but followed him into the bathroom.

“You’re so hopeless Bucky.”

“That’s why I have you, sweetheart,” Bucky winked.


	16. I'm so sorry

**Day 16 – Doing something together (Pranks)**

 

“Natasha.”

“No,” Steve said, outraged, “do you want to die.”

“Hmmm, you’re right,” Bucky agreed, pondering, “Tony?”

“Knowing life, JARVIS is eavesdropping and will tell him if we try anything.”

“ _That is correct, Mr Rogers.”_

Bucky winced.

“Okay who then?”

“Bruce?” Steve offered, “he wouldn’t be that mad…”

“Yeah,” Bucky snorted, “but the Hulk would.”

“Oh yeah…,”  Steve sighed, “I don’t know. I’m out of ideas.”

The two laid on the couch in silence for a while, thinking. Bucky poked Steve with his toe.

“Change your socks.”

“No way.”

More silence. It was dark outside, loud music came from Wanda’s room (Russian – ugh), Bruce was baking something in the kitchen (again). Tony appeared, said ‘Sup guys’ and then went back to his lab with a cup of coffee.

“I got it!” Bucky said, clicking his fingers.

“Go on then,” Steve was tired now, after so much time not speaking, on the couch, with Bucky’s warmth so close…, “what is the master prank that we will play on the Avengers?”

“We’re going to pretend to date and see who falls for it,” Bucky said with a massive grin. Steve stared at him. Then he burst out laughing,

“Nice one Buck, but nobody’s going to fall for it,” he said,

“What do you mean?” Bucky pouted, “you doubt my acting skills?”

“You want to trick an assassin, a witch, a _God,_ two geniuses and a  S.H.I.E.L.D agent into thinking we’re dating?” Steve clarified with a raised eyebrow.

“Damn right,” Bucky was grinning. Steve high-fived him.

“Let’s do this.”

***

Bucky was sleeping soundly in his room, snoring a bit, and overall being very nice and comfortable, when the door to his room opened. The Winter Soldier jumped to his feet, the dagger he always had under his pillow in hand, ready to attack the invader.

“Relax, Bucky,” Steve rolled his eyes and, ignoring the knife in Bucky’s hand, plopped his covers onto Bucky’s bed, closing the door with his foot.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Bucky hissed, “you scared me. I could’ve stabbed you.”

“Can you put the knife away?” Steve sighed and slid into the space by the wall. Hesitantly, Bucky put the knife on his bedside stand. He stood on the mattress, hovering over Steve who had closed his eyes.

“So…why are you here again?”

“To keep up appearances Bucky,” the blonde snapped, “if we’re going out it means we sleep together.”

“And have lots of sex, yeah?” Bucky grinned. Steve’s eyes snapped open and he blushed.

“Shut up and go to sleep,” the blonde grumbled. Bucky jumped under his covers and turned to face the door. He could feel Steve’s breath against the nap of his neck, as well as the heat radiating off of him,

“You’re gonna cuddle me or what?” Bucky asked impatiently. Steve chuckled, but then plastered himself against Bucky’s back. The brunette’s breath caught in his throat even though it definitely wasn’t supposed to. Steve wrapped one strong arm around Bucky’s waist, and interlocked his fingers with Bucky’s. He even went as far as kissing the brunette’s shoulder.

“’Night, Buck.”

“Night, Steve,” Bucky breathed. He was really glad that Steve couldn’t see his burning-red face.

***

They came down to breakfast hand – in – hand, fingers interlocked. Steve was surprised at how easy it was to touch Bucky, holding his hand seemed natural, the touch didn’t feel invasive…it was nice.

Bruce started choking on his green tea when he saw them, and Natasha raised an eyebrow.

“Are you two a couple?” Thor boomed. Steve fought a wince; he forgot that the God might be homophobic…

“Yes, we are actually,” Bucky said with an easy smile. He squeezed Steve’s hand, as if to calm him down. A broad smile spread on Thor’s face.

“Congratulations my friends!” he roared, “much happiness to you both.”

“Er, thanks,” Steve said, sliding into a free chair. Bucky sat next to him and reached for the toast. Natasha stuck both of her hands out, looking smug. Clint placed fifty dollars in one of her hands, grumbling. Tony didn’t even wince as he put a small fortune in her other one.

“I win,” she said twinkling. Bucky and Steve exchanged a look.

“You placed bets on us?!” Steve asked accusingly. Natasha shrugged,

“Maybe.”

***

There was a battle, nothing major, just some more of Loki’s antics. Thor cursed his brother and flew to Asgard halfway through. One of the bots that the Avengers were fighting attacked the Red Witch.

“Wanda!” Bucky yelled. Sam fly kicked the thing away from the girl, but it was enough to cause a distraction. One of the bots slashed Bucky’s side. Steve felt his blood run cold. He chucked his shield and it sailed through the air, slicing the bot in two.

Without even thinking about it, Steve sprinted to Bucky, who was cursing.

“Are you alright?” Steve demanded. Bucky touched his side and his hand came back stained with blood, “Oh God. Shit. Bucky I-I…” Steve’s voice faltered. His hands hovered over Bucky’s wound.

“It’s alright, don’t worry,” Bucky said, but he winced.

“Come on, we have to get you back to the tower,” Steve said, panicking. All he could see in his mind was Bucky falling out of the plane, tumbling down into the icy nothingness…

“Steve. Steve.” Bucky reached up and touched Steve’s face with his clean hand, “it’s alright. I’m alright,” he smiled. The battle around them ended.

“Kiss it better?” Bucky asked, and it sounded like a challenge. Steve rolled his eyes and leaned forward, pressing his lips against Bucky’s. The kiss was sweet and slow and it made Steve’s heart beat faster…

“Guys!” Natasha exclaimed. Steve reluctantly pulled away from Bucky, “now is _not_ the time.”

***

“Are you feeling better?” Steve asked. Bucky was laying in his… _their_ bed.

“Yes, Steve. For the _last_ time I’m _fine.”_ The brunette said, exasperated. Steve smiled fondly and brushed a piece of Bucky’s long hair behind his ear. Bucky’s eyes softened.

Steve suddenly pulled himself up on top of the brunette. Bucky’s brow furrowed.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“Practicing,” Steve said cheekily, and then kissed Bucky gently. Bucky smiled into the kiss. “Please be okay. I want you to be okay.”

“Well, I’m better now that you’re here,” Bucky grinned and wrapped his arms around Steve’s neck. He pulled him back down for another kiss. One thing led to another, and when Clint came in to ask about something, he found Bucky with Steve’s tongue in his mouth.

“Ah!” the agent screamed, covering his eyes, “PDA! PDA!” and then he ran out.

Bucky and Steve exchanged a look. Bucky giggled and stifled it in Steve’s shoulder.

“Nailed it,” Steve smirked, and high-fived his “pretend” boyfriend.

***

“They’re pretending,” Natasha stated, as she, Tony and Clint drank beer in Tony’s lab. The two men nodded in confirmation. The redhead got an evil glint in her eye, “bet you twenty bucks that they’ll end up confessing their love for eachother.

“Deal.” Tony shook her hand.

***

“I have no idea what’s going on,” Bruce admitted. Wanda smirked,

“They love each other, yes?” she asked.

“Well…yeah,” Sam admitted. Even he wasn’t that blind to not see the looks Bucky and Steve gave each other.

“Then let them love each other,” Wanda said. Thor nodded in agreement.

***

Two weeks later, and they were still pretending.

Steve woke up with sunshine filtering in through the curtains. The blonde sat up and stretched, groaning. Bucky shifted next to him, and Steve just happened to look at him at that moment.

Bucky’s dark eyelashes cast shadows on his cheeks, his hair was a mess, a shadow of a smile on his lips. Subconsciously he reached for Steve, and after finding only his pillow, cuddled into it.

“Steve…,” he whispered breathily. Steve’s heart clenched, he gently pulled the pillow away from Bucky and then proceeded to kiss him. Bucky opened his eyes and blinked owlishly.

“Hey,” he said tiredly with a lazy smile. He pulled Steve down next to him, so they were looking at each other. Steve didn’t say anything, not trusting his voice, and kissed Bucky again. The brunette snuggled up closer to him.

“To what do I owe the pleasure?” he asked quietly. “Is someone at the door?”

“No,” Steve mumbled.

“Are you practicing again?” Bucky asked, his eyes closed.

“No.” Steve leaned forward and kissed Bucky’s forehead, his cheek, the tip of his nose. He placed a kiss in the corner of his mouth, and then peppered soft kisses down his neck. Steve brushed Bucky’s shirt off of his shoulder and kissed his skin.

“Steve?” Bucky mumbled, confused. Steve pulled back up and kissed the brunette again, “what’s up with you today.” Steve looked away, “not that I’m complaining or anything,” Bucky cupped Steve’s face and turned the blonde to look at him.

“I just realized something s’all,” Steve mumbled. Bucky pulled him closer, smiling,

“Oh yeah?” he teased, “what did you realize.”

“That I’m in love with you,” Steve said. Bucky’s smile widened,

“Of course you are,” he said, “I’m amazing.” He yawned adorably. Steve kissed the tip of his nose. This all felt so comfortable, so good, it wasn’t awkward or weird.

“Aren’t you going to say you love me too?” Steve asked, brushing their noses together. Bucky rolled his eyes,

“I love you too,” he stuck his tongue out. Steve kissed him again.

***

“Boom. Pay up.” Natasha grinned. Tony rolled his eyes and handed her her money. Then they moved away from Bucky’s and Steve’s room.


	17. The shadows on my wall don't sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ones kinda dark.

**Chapter 17 –Apocalypse AU**

September, 2034

The good thing about this world; nobody judges anyone anymore. If you’re a murderer, if you’re a different skin colour, religion, race, if you’re gay or lesbian or pansexual or straight. Nobody judges you, because nobody cares.

The bad thing about this world; everyone’s death. Well…everyone except Steve and Bucky.

“How am I going to survive an eternity with you?” Steven Rogers complained as he and his best friend walked down the empty road. Cars were parked on either side, dead bodies lying around. There were no flies to pick at the corpses.

“You just will have to,” James “Bucky” Barnes grinned, and continued singing his stupid song. Since the beginning of the apocalypse two years ago, Steve and Bucky had been the only two living creatures they saw. Everywhere they looked there were bodies, decaying and rotting, skeletons and bones. Stray dogs were collapsed on sides of roads, cats and rats and spiders. Everything and everyone was dead, except for Steve and Bucky. The tiny blonde boy sniffed the air,

“Buck, I think it’s going to rain,” he said, “we should find a place to sleep.”

His friend agreed, and together they ran across the road. The only noise was their footsteps slapping against the pavement, the wind whistling past their ears and the distant sound of thunder.

***

The flat they chose was small and cosy. There were no rotting bodies in it, and not unflushed shit in the toilet. There was rotten food in the fridge though – there always was.

“Check if they have beer?” Bucky asked, plopping down on the couch. A fine layer of dust sat over the furniture and it came up in a cloud when the brunette sat down. Steve wrinkled his nose, but he didn’t really mind the rotting. He was used to all types of smells, including himself. He didn’t get a chance to bathe very often.

“Buckyyy,” Steve sang, walking in, a can of baked beans and a can of beer in his hands. The brunette fist pumped the air,

“Hell yeah!” he said, grinning. Steve sat down next to him and passed him the beer. He himself opened the can of beans and began eating it with a spoon he found in the kitchen. Bucky silently chugged down half his beer and Steve ate half the beans, before they swapped. The beer made Steve fell a bit warmer.

***

They sat by the window, bundled up in covers. It was getting dark, like _really_ dark. There were no lights on, no lanterns or planes. No stars or moon, just clouds that lit up with lightning sometimes.

“We should’ve found candles,” Steve mumbled as thunder rolled through the world. The rain started falling, hitting the ground angrily, as if punishing it further. Everything outside was black and grey.

Bucky’s hand found Steve’s under the covers.

“The world’s so quiet,” he whispered. Steve nodded, a faraway look in his eyes.

“I miss it,” he admitted, “all the noise.”

“Yeah,” Bucky smiled, nostalgically, “like cars. And planes. God, what I wouldn’t do to hear a plane again.”

“Loud fuckers,” Steve was smiling, “and kids shouting outside, and drunkards stumbling around. I used to hate the noises.”

“I know,” Bucky whispered, “I wish I could hear neighbours, a phone ringing, a TV playing.”

“Yeah, I wish too…,” Steve leaned his forehead against Bucky’s shoulder. The brunette kissed the top of his head.

***

It was stifling hot the next day.

“What is this?” Steve complained, “it’s meant to be autumn! Come on!”

Bucky laughed,

“Last warm of the year,” he joked, “you’ll miss it.”

Steve stuck his tongue out.

“Oh look!” he said, pointing, “a convenience store!”

“Awesome!” Bucky smiled and sprinted inside. For a moment Steve was alone and the loneliness gripped his heart. He imagined leaving in this shadow of a world without Bucky, all by himself…

“You coming punk?” Bucky asked. Steve nodded and ran after him.”

The inside of the store was musty and filled with dust particles swirling through the air. Bucky was rummaging through shelves of food, perfectly organized.

“Okay. We’ve got sweetcorn, peas, mac and cheese, spaghetti meatballs,” the brunette pulled a face, “liver. Ew.”

Steve laughed and unzipped his bag,

“Just put it in.” He said. He spotted bottled water, “awesome, some drink.”

“Yeah we’ll need that.” Bucky agreed, tossing cans into Steve’s backpack. Steve’s shoulders slumped,

“What are we still doing here Buck?” he asked suddenly, quietly. He sounded so miserable that Bucky had to look up. He frowned,

“What do you mean?” he asked.

“I mean…,” Steve bit his lip, “everyone’s dead, except us. Where are we even going? We don’t have an aim, a point…”

“We could go to the seaside,” Bucky offered,

“It’s almost winter.”

The brunette stood up and squeezed Steve’s shoulder.

“Let’s just get to the sea and then…and then we’ll see.” He smiled tightly.

***

2 weeks later

The two were in someone’s house. It was a massive mansion, beautiful and white and dead. The bodies of children laid in the children’s room, and Steve couldn’t bear to look at them. So he and Bucky sat in the kitchen, and the brunette was messing with the record player. He had found an old Oasis vinyl and was trying to get the thing to work.

“You’ll break it,” Steve grinned. Bucky rolled his eyes, determined,

“Even if I do it doesn’t matter. It’s not like anyone-” he broke off when ‘She’s Electric’ began playing. “Woo hoo!” Bucky exclaimed. He pulled Steve off of his stool, “I fixed it!”

“Oh yeah. And now what?”

“Now you dance with me,” Bucky smiled. Steve grinned and let the brunette spin him around the stranger’s kitchen, singing loudly and off-beat to the old Oasis song.

***

26 days later

“The stars are beautiful,” Steve said.

“Mhm,” Bucky agreed, destroying the moment by chewing loudly on Pringles. Steve gave him a disgusted look. They were laying on someone’s roof, looking up at the clear sky. “God bless pringles,” Bucky sighed, “the only crisp company that doesn’t sell air.”

“Technically they don‘t sell them anymore,” Steve argued, “we basically stole them.”

“Killjoy,” Bucky grumbled. A silence settled over the two of them, calm and quiet. So, so quiet.

“It was my birthday yesterday,” Bucky murmured. Steve sat up abruptly,

“What?! No way!” he yelled, “why didn’t you tell me?!”

Bucky shrugged,

“I don’t know. I didn’t think it was important.” He said, “I’m twenty-six now.”

“Oh Bucky,” Steve sighed. He leaned over and hugged his best friend tightly. Bucky clung onto him and started crying, “Happy birthday,” Steve whispered. Bucky just held onto him.

***

19 days later

“Steve why are you carrying a gun?” Bucky asked suspiciously. Steve shrugged,

“Just in case.”

“Just in case?”

“Yeah. Just in case…”

***

3 days later

“Well…,” Steve said, “here we are.”

It wa snowing, and there was a fine layer of ice on the beach. Ice particles floated in the grey, stormy water that stretched on for miles. A dead fish floated on the surface before sinking below. Some parts of the beaches were littered with dead sea life. Tears rolled down Steve’s cheeks,

“It’s kind of beautiful,” he admitted, “it’s like it’s meant to be this quiet. Just you and me and the ocean.”

“And that dead seal over there,” Bucky added. Steve laughed through his tears. Then he began sobbing,

“I don’t want to live like this, Bucky,” he whimpered, “I don’t want it to just be us. It’s so fucking quiet and I can’t stand it. I can’t stand it just being us two, without a purpose.”

Bucky looked hurt,

“B-But,” he started, “I had a purpose. I still do.”

“What purpose?” Steve wiped his eyes.

“I was going to make you fall in love with me,” the brunette said softly. Steve smiled even as his tears kept coming.

“You did it, Buck.” He said, “you made me fall in love with you.” He turned and looked into his eyes, “I love you.”

Bucky kissed him softly.

“Please don’t make me live like this,” Steve murmured.

“We’re already dead.” Bucky replied, opening Steve’s bag and pulling out the gun.

“This will be a good place to rest,” Steve said, “the sand will cover us soon enough. All those bodies out there will burn and decay and turn to bones, and those bones will turn to ashes and be blown away. Nature wins again,” He held Bucky’s hand, “we fucked up, Buck. We really fucked up. Humanity really fucked up. Maybe…maybe in hundreds of years life will return. Maybe they’ll get a clean slate, a new start. Maybe they’ll do this right.”

“Maybe,” Bucky agreed, smiling. He wasn’t crying, he looked happy, “see you on the other side, Steve.” He said. He squeezed his eyes shut and pressed the gun to his temple.

The bang seemed to resonate through the whole world, the only sound. The last sound made by humans before they were wiped out. The last humans.

Steve watched Bucky’s body fall to the ground, watched his blood soak the sand and color it red. It was still snowing, and Steve was glad.

For a moment, just for a moment, Steve was the only living thing in the world. There were no people, no animals, just this tiny, insignificant human being standing on a beach with his best friend’s body. That insignificant human was about to end the human race.

“This is how the world ends. Not with a bang but with a whimper,” Steve said. But it wasn’t really, it wasn’t ending. Steve was just dying. The blonde turned to the sea. It was dead, devoid of life, but maybe someday, maybe…, “goodbye, world. You gotta admit, I put up a good fight. But I’m tired now. So thank you, and I’m sorry.” Steve whispered. His voice was carried by the wind. And then he pulled the trigger.


	18. My age has never made me wise

**Day 18 – Arguing**

“You think this is _funny?_ ” Steve seethed. Bucky looked at him, unimpressed, “you think going into battle _alone_ is _funny_?!”

“Maybe I do. But that’s none of your business,” the brunette shrugged. Steve was fuming, hands clenched into fists, face red,

“You’re a real fucking idiot, you know that!” he yelled, “you have no respect for anyone! Not even yourself!”

“Whatever, Steve.” Bucky turned to the door, shoving his hands into his pockets. Steve reached out suddenly and roughly spun his friend around,

“Don’t talk to me like that! You could’ve gotten killed! Why do you always have to do this-”

“Stop it,” Bucky snapped, shaking Steve’s strong hand off, “I’m not a boy anymore. I’m not a soldier anymore. I’m a _superhero._ I can take care of myself, Steve.”

“No you can’t!” Steve said, exasperated, “You didn’t see that grenade coming. If it wasn’t for me…,” his voice faltered.

“Oh for god’s sake,” Bucky sighed, “I survived seventy years in HYDRA, you think a grenade’s going to kill me?”

“Something will!” Steve exploded, “Maybe you ain’t that abducted soldier anymore, but you’re not invincible!”

“Yes I am!” Bucky retaliated, “I’m the Winter Soldier.”

“Yes, and I’m Captain America,” Steve snorted humourlessly, “take away the the strength and the youth and I’m just a sick Brooklyn boy. Take away _your_ strength and youth metal arm and _you’re_ just a soldier in bound to a chair. Take away Tony’s armour and he’s just an billionaire! Take away Thor’s power and he’s just a normal man! Don’t you _see_?!” he demanded. Bucky pushed him away, and Steve stumbled backwards,

“Why do you always have to be like that?!” he shouted, “why can’t you just tell me I did a good job instead of pestering me, over and over! I saved them didn’t I! I didn’t die!”

“But what about next time?!” Steve growled, pushing Bucky into the wall, “what about next time you fucking dumbass? What if the bullet doesn’t miss and I won’t be there to save you?!”

“I’ll be there to save myself,” Bucky hissed, suddenly lowering his voice, “I almost died _alone_. I was tortured and experimented on by HYDRA _alone,_ ” his voice rose, and Steve stumbled back, eyes wide“I was sent on an almost suicide mission against my best friend _alone._ I had to do it all by _myself._ I don’t need your help. I don’t need you!”

Hurt filled Steve’s eyes and it sent a sudden pang of regret through Bucky. The brunette’s voice died in his throat as Steve stared at him. Bucky wanted to fix this. He needed to fix this.

_I didn’t mean that Steve. Of course I need you, I’ll always need you. Please don’t leave me , I love you. I love you so much, don’t listen to me I’m just being stupid. I won’t die, so just…_

“Sorry for worrying.” Steve whispered. Bucky couldn’t utter a word as the blonde walked out of the room. He heard the front door slam behind him. Bucky threw himself onto his bed like an angsty teenager, and started crying. Wanda came in with tissues and smoothed down his hair, comforting him until Steve came back.


	19. 4am beside myself and what I think of mental health

**Day 18 - Making up**

 

Steve laid on the couch, facing away from the room, his face buried in a pillow. It was fucking freezing in the living room, which caused the blonde’s small frame to shiver. The only light came from the half-burned down candle that sat on the table, dripping wax onto the wood. Steve fought the tears. It’s been such a shitty day; first it started snowing and their heating went out, which meant that Steve had to wear all of his (and Bucky’s) jumpers in order not to freeze to death, and he’d gotten a runny nose as well (so attractive).

Bucky had the brilliant idea to go out dancing that night, to ‘celebrate’ the first snow. And as much as Steve hated it, he told Bucky that it was alright. And then Bucky left and the power went out. Steve was terrified of the dark, which wasn’t something many people knew, and after gathering as many candles as he could with his trembling hands, he set out to try and fix the problem. Which ended up with him almost passing out in the snow and getting into a bit of an argument with a street drunk.

When Bucky found him, Steve soaked through all of their warm clothes, and was sporting a bruise on his cheek. Bucky, a bit drunk, had a massive go at Steve, saying some pretty harsh stuff.

_You’re so fucking useless! Why can’t you just stay inside!_

_You’re always getting into trouble, don’t you get that you’re too fucking small to do anything!_

_You know how much I wanted to go, it’s not my fault the doll’s don’t like you!_

When Bucky eventually dragged Steve back inside, the blonde gathered up the covers from his mattress and went to the living room, where he proceeded to cry. He couldn’t stand to be in the same room as Bucky, who smelled of whiskey and female perfume, and who was angry with him. Steve knew that it was his fault and that he was an idiot, but he couldn’t stand it, he just couldn’t…

The door to their tiny living room creaked open, and Steve squeezed his eyes shut. Soft footsteps padded across the bare, wooden floor, and then a warm hand was untucking Steve covers from around him.

“Scoot up,” Bucky said, voice hoarse. He blew out the candle and darkness blanketed Steve. He sniffed a bit but moved up as far as he could. The bigger boy wiggled his way under Steve’s covers. They shuffled around wordlessly, trying to find a comfortable position. Bucky had washed up and he just smelled like himself now, and Steve was suddenly really glad that he was there.

Eventually they ended up face-to face, with Bucky almost squashing Steve against the couch. Their legs were tangled under the covers, Bucky’s arm loosely wrapped around the blonde’s waist. It was crowded but warm, and surprisingly comfortable. Steve’s shivers subsided.

Bucky’s hand found its way underneath Steve’s thin shirt (the only dry one left) and started rubbing circled into his skin.

“I’m so sorry.” He whispered, voice rough. His warm eyes were rimmed with red. Steve smiled,

“It’s okay,” he said quietly, “you’re drunk, you didn’t mean what you said…,” the blonde sighed, “and even if you did, then…well, it’s true. Everything you said is true.”

“No it-”

“Shh. It’s okay Buck,” Steve snaked his arms around Bucky’s neck and pulled him impossibly closer, “it’s okay. It’s nothing.”

“No, no, Stevie,” Bucky’s voice slurred a bit, his eyes hazy. He pulled away from Steve to properly look at him, “I…I don’t really remember what I said. Steve…what did I say?”

“Nothing.” Steve said quickly.

“Steve,” Bucky pressed their foreheads together. Steve hated when he did that, because it meant that their lips were inches apart and that if he leaned forward just a tiny bit, he would be able to kiss the other man. It wasn’t like Bucky would remember it the next day…the blonde sighed and pulled away slightly,

“You called me useless,” he said. Regret filled Bucky’s eyes, “hey. No. You’re right, I’m useless. I’m really fucking useless,” Steve laughed trying to lighten up the atmosphere, “I can’t even fix the power-”

“No,” Bucky interrupted, “no, Stevie don’t say that. Don’t say that, it’s not true! You’re an amazing artist…”

Steve rolled his eyes,

“Yeah, but but that’s about it. And I ain’t even that good.”

“Yeah you are,” Bucky argued, “and you’re such a good friend, and you stick up for others, and you’re the bravest person I know. You’re not useless.”

Steve just shook his head, and muttered ‘whatever you say’ under his breath, because it wasn’t like Bucky was going to remember it in the morning.

“What else did I say?” the brunette asked. His free hand found Steve’s cheeks and both of his thumbs were brushing the blonde’s skin in sync, causing his skin to prickle.

“I…um…,” Steve was suddenly feeling really warm, “W-Well, you said something about me being too small to like…do anything? I-I don’t remember,” he finished hastily, cheeks red in embarrassment because that one was _really_ true.

“Oh.” Bucky said. He sounded so miserable that it made Steve’s heart ache. The brunette’s breath smelled of alcohol and cigarettes. “You are small thought,” he said, as if just realizing. Steve laughed,

“Well done for realizing, do you want an award?” he teased.

“I like it,” Bucky said, smiling so that his dimple showed. He ignored Steve’s remark, “I like that you’re really small. It’s like you fit into my arms perfectly,” he mused, and pulled Steve closer as if to prove his point. Steve stared at him, blushing, while the brunette wrapped both arms around him.

“B-Buck, you’re drunk.”

“What else did I say?” Bucky asked, ignoring him and burying his face in the boy’s shoulder.

“J-Just that the girl’s don’t like me,” he said.

“Well I like you,” Bucky whispered, “I like you a lot.”

“I like you too, Buck.”

“No, not like that,” Bucky pulled himself up to look at the blonde. His was looking at Steve weirdly. He glanced at the blonde’s lips and his heart started to beat really fast.

“Bucky…”

“Can I kiss you?” Bucky asked suddenly, casually. Steve swallowed and felt the tips of his ears heat up.

“W-Why?”

“Because I like you,” Bucky said like it was obvious, “and I want to say sorry.”

“It’s okay. You don’t have to apologize,” Steve said quickly and flipped over so that his face was pressed into the couch.

“Steve…,” Bucky whined. He grabbed Steve by the waist and, ignoring the blonde’s weak protests, flipped him over. Now the brunette was hovering above the smaller boy, “Don’t you want to kiss me?”

“I…um,” Steve’s throat felt dry. He didn’t want to lie, but he couldn’t tell Bucky the truth, “Buck, you’re drunk.”

“I’m not _that_ drunk,” Bucky pouted. Steve looked up at him. He knew that he should probably tell Bucky to get off and go to sleep, but he couldn’t bring himself to do so.

“One little kiss,” Steve breathed, almost against his will. Bucky smiled and it lit up his whole face. He moved to lean on his elbows and then ducked his head. His lips pressed against Steve’s. It was a chaste kiss, but it was warm and soft and just really _nice._ It made Steve shiver, but it wasn’t because of the cold. Bucky pulled away looking like he just won a million dollars,

“I’m sorry,” he said again.

“It’s okay,” Steve whispered, “I’m sorry too.”

Bucky climbed off of him, a bit unsteady, and immediately Steve missed his warmth. But then the brunette pulled the covers off of the blonde, threw them over his shoulder, tucked the pillow under his arm and easily picked Steve up, bridal style.

“W-What are you doing?!” Steve squeaked.

“Going to bed,” Bucky said innocently, “don’t worry. Just to sleep.”

“Okay.” Steve mumbled and buried his face in Bucky’s shoulder.


	20. I'm just a man, a man on a mission

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just some fighting.

**Day 20 – In battle, side by side**

“Left!” Steve yelled, ducking under the arm of the troll. Bucky slashed to the left, effectively cutting on of the troll’s minions down.

“Steve!” Bucky tackled the blonde to the ground as a war hammer sailed over their heads. Captain America looked at Bucky for a second, before clambering to his feet and helping his comrade up. Natasha was running on the rooftops, leading some of the smaller trolls into an abyss. Clint was running on the parallel rooftop to hers, shooting arrows at the monsters who got too close.

Three trolls charged at Bucky and Steve. They were about eight feet tall, green with boils all over their disgusting skin. Their eyes were milky green and they were attacking with an assortment of weapons varying from axes to wooden clubs and rocks. Half of Brooklyn was already in pieces, crushed by the trolls.

Steve threw his shield like a boomerang, taking out the three trolls. But where they crumbled to dust, more appeared, roaring angrily.

Thor was summoning lightning down the road, striking down troll after troll, but more kept appearing.

“We need to close the portal!” Bucky yelled. Steve nodded,

“You go! I’ll keep them back!”

Bucky nodded and then he was sprinting off. Steve ran after him, smashing trolls as he went. The Hulk came stumbling out of an alleyway. Mini trolls climbed up his frame but he ripped them off as if they were bugs and tossed them against walls. A monster lumbered at Bucky, but Clint pierced it with an arrow before it could reach the Winter Soldier.

“Thank God for Clint,” Steve said. He was almost on Bucky’s feet at this point, running backwards and crushing monsters against buildings with his shield.

“How many are there?!” he demanded.

“Too many!” Wanda declared, coming out of nowhere. The air was thick with red around her, and with a wave of her hand half a dozen trolls decided to take a nice soak in the Brooklyn river. They perished immediately.

“Nearly there, Steve!” Bucky called. Tony and Sam were zooming across the skies, plucking up trolls and dropping them back down from ridiculous heights.

“There!” Steve called, pointing into an alleyway. A blue whirlpool shimmered against a wall, and monsters spilled out onto the street.

“Great!” Bucky grinned and changed course. Steve ran after him, but had to tackle a troll to the ground in order to clear the path. Bucky stopped running and began shooting everything in sight. A troll came too close and the Winter Soldier punched it out of existence.

“ _Everyone_ ,” Tony spoke through their earpieces, “ _get down to help Cap and Bucky. They have the portal_.”

“ _Roger that_!” Clint summersaulted off a rooftop, still shooting as he went. Natasha followed close behind while Wanda, Thor and Hulk took the back alleys and Tony and Sam protected them from the air.

“We’ve got this!” Bucky ripped through a troll, “come on Steve!”

The two charged into the alleyway, taking out monster after monster after monster.

“Shit!” Bucky yelled suddenly. Steve glanced over, still smiling over their sure victory.

Bucky stood, a troll behind him, a sharp spike sticking out of his chest. Blood stained his suit and poured out of his mouth.

“B-Buck?” Steve asked, mouth dry. An arrow pierced through the troll’s head and it disappeared alongside it’s spike, leaving behind Bucky with a gaping hole in his chest. The Winter Soldier crumbled to his feet but Steve managed to catch him before he hit the ground, “Bucky?! Oh God, no…”

“ _Steve!_ ” Tony barked, “ _now is not the time!”_

“But he’s dying!” Steve yelled.

“ _Close the portal_!” Natasha screamed through the earpiece.

“Go,” Bucky said through gritted teeth. Reluctantly, Steve lowered him down onto the concrete and with a new found strength smashed through the monsters. He saw red, his vision was blurry from tears, but he continued destroying the trolls. Ash and dust rained around him, but he didn’t care. He knew that somewhere behind him, his best friend was dying, because of these creatures.

Before he knew it, Steve was standing in front of the portal.

“How do I close it?!” he demanded,

“ _Steve_ ,” Wanda spoke, “ _throw your shield into it!”_

“What?”

“ _Do it!”_ Bucky croaked through the earpiece. Steve refused to turn round and look at him, especially since more dark shapes were appearing in the portal. With a deep breath, Steve threw his shield. It sailed through the air and then disappeared into the portal. The buildings around them began crumbling, but Steve didn’t care. He sprinted back to Bucky.

“Buck,” he fell to his knees. Bucky was bleeding badly, his breathing laboured, “Bucky, don’t die on me. We’ll get you to a hospital and-” Steve’s voice faltered.

“Too late,” Bucky’s smile was stained red. His body flickered and disappeared. The buildings buried the portal.

**LEVEL COMPLETE**

Shone across the screen. Dramatic music began playing and a scroll unrolled,

_You have done well, Avengers._

_However one of yours is dead, and Captain America’s shield is lost. The next step of your battle is to go to Asgard to retrieve it. Do you agree to continue on your quest?_

“Press yes!” Tony yelled. Bucky chucked his controlled across the room,

“Fuck this game,” he grumbled, settling into Steve’s lap. The blonde smiled and kissed his head,

“Sorry Bucky, it’s not my fault you suck…”

“…Dick!” Natasha and Clint high-fived,

“Did you see the mad team work skills we have?” the Black Widow asked.

“I’m gonna get some snacks before the next round,” Sam sighed and got up from the couch.

“Wanda, thanks for the help with the portal,” Steve grinned at the Scarlett Witch.

“Am I the only one who bothered to read the instructions?”

“Yes.” Everyone said in unison.

“I’m not playing anymore,” Bucky declared.

“You can’t play anyway!” Tony laughed, “you’re dead!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol don't hate me please!  
> Leave comments and kudos, and check out my other works!


	21. There's you in everything I do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just some dancing and old songs.  
> Please leave kudos and comments!

**Day 21 – Dancing**

Bucky came in, humming happily to himself. He chucked his keys into the bowl by the doors and toed off his dancing shoes.

“How was your evening?” Steve asked, looking up from where he was sketching their kitchen table. A random assortment of a rotten apple and a jug of water stood on top of it, ready for the blonde to transform it into a fruit bowl and a vase of flowers on his paper.

“It was alright,” Bucky was grinning as he threw himself down next to his best friend on their old, worn couch.

“Just alright?” Steve raised an eyebrow, his hands smudging the pencil lines, adding shadows and a more 3D look to it. Bucky peeked over his shoulder, breath ghosting around Steve’s neck,

“Yeah. You know I like it better when you come,” the brunette said. Steve shrugged and shuffled away from Bucky before his friend could see his blush,

“Ya know I can’t dance, Buck,” the blonde said, snapping his notebook shut, “I’m going to sleep.”

***

Bucky was making tea from the last of their supplies, calculating in his head how many days they could go before it was payday. He’d come back from working at the docks tired and sweaty, as always.

Steve walked into the kitchen. The radio was playing softly in the background, some new jazz song that Bucky was humming along to.

“Finally awake I see,” Bucky glanced at Steve with a teasing grin. The blonde rubbed his eyes and yawned. He shivered a bit, despite Bucky’s oversized jumper that he was wearing and the warm socks on his feet.

Bucky glanced guiltily at the last cup of tea, and then offered it to Steve,

“Here, you look cold,” he said, although he _really_ wanted the tea. But he wanted Steve to be warm and happy more.

“No, it’s okay, you have it,” Steve brushed him off. Bucky produced another chipped mug out of their cupboard and poured half the tea into it. He then offered it to Steve, who rolled his eyes but took it anyway, “thanks.”

The two sipped their drinks in a comfortable silence, listening to the radio. Some color returned to Steve’s pale skin.

The song changed suddenly to _The Andrews Sisters - Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy Of Company B_ and Bucky perked up, putting his cup down.

“Oh my goodness!” he gushed like a little girl, eyes sparkling, “that’s my song!”

Steve just rolled his eyes and, before he had time to protest, Bucky pulled him forward. The blonde barely had time to put his cup down,

“Buck I can’t dance!” Steve squeaked, but Bucky was already spinning him round.

“C’mon! It ain’t that hard!” he was grinning like a child on Christmas day.

“He was the top man at his craft,” Bucky sang along, one hand holding Steve’s, the other on the blonde’s waist, “But then his number came up and he was gone with the draft.” He spun both him and Steve around the kitchen, gracefully, while the blonde tried to not step on his feet, “He's in the army now, a-blowin' reveille. He's the boogie woogie bugle boy of Company B!”

Steve couldn’t help but laugh at how happy Bucky was. He forgot to worry about his clumsiness for a second, and suddenly he and Bucky were perfectly in rhythm.

“See!” Bucky was still grinning, “you _can_ dance!”

“Oh shut up,” Steve blushed while Bucky dramatically mouthed the lyrics to the song. Steve stepped away suddenly, his face bright red,

“Um. That’s enough dancing I think,” he said, tucking a piece of his hair behind his ear nervously and staring at the ground. Bucky gave him a weird look, and then continued prancing around the kitchen by himself, singing loudly. Steve watched him with a fond smile.

“Oh come on Stevie,” Bucky whined suddenly, placing both of his hands behind Steve on the counter, caging the boy in. The blonde raised an eyebrow and Bucky pouted, “it’s no fun dancing by myself.”

Steve noticed how close the two of them were and fought the blush once again rising in his cheeks. Lately he couldn’t help being nervous around Bucky and it was starting to get annoying. He sighed, and the song changed.

The low, deep voice of Dick Haymes rang out through the kitchen.

“ _You'll never know just how much I miss you, you'll never know just how much I care…,_ ” Steve and Bucky stared at each other, only now noticing that their faces were inches apart, “ _and if I tried, I still couldn't hide my love for you…_ ”

“Um, Bucky…,” Steve started, trying to push himself away from his friend, but he was trapped.

“May I have this dance?” Bucky asked solemnly, his smile gone. Steve blinked at him, and then looked away, face red, hiding behind his hair,

“I…u-um, o-okay,” he stuttered eventually. He hesitantly took Bucky’s hand, still not looking at him. The brunette pulled him forward until Steve’s was close enough for him to wrap his arm around his waist. Bucky was staring at the blonde, and it was making him blush even more. Steve ducked his head and pressed himself closer to Bucky, burying his face in his shoulder.

Bucky smiled softly and interlaced his fingers with Steve’s. He began leading him around the room in slow circles, swaying to the music. Steve relaxed against him and smiled when Bucky began whispering the words, right into his ear.

“If there is some other way to prove that I love you, I swear I don't know how. You'll never know if you don't know now…” 


	22. I’m a reckless mistake, I’m a cold night’s intake

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll never be a therapist.

**Day 22 - Gazing into each other’s eyes**

  


“You should try it James,” Bucky’s therapist said, “gazing into people’s eyes will make you more comfortable around them. Trust me!”

Bucky didn’t trust her. Not one bit.

***

Natasha had the most unnerving green eyes. They were soft like moss that clung to rocks above a dangerous, fierce waterfall. And although the color was soft, the girl’s expression was always mischievous, light dancing around against her iris.

“You done yet?” Natasha raised an eyebrow, biting an apple. She hadn’t blinked for three minutes and it was really unnerving.

“Er, yeah,” Bucky shrugged, “sure, thanks.”

***

“Whaaat are you doing?” Tony demanded when Bucky leaned across his work table, staring at him intensely.

“ _It’s one of his therapist’s ideas,”_ JARVIS explained, “ _According to studies looking into people’s eyes will make them seem more trustworthy.”_

“Oh. Alright then,” Tony rolled his eyes, “be quick though. I have work to do!”

Bucky looked into Tony’s eyes. They were a cool brown, calculating but not unfriendly. Bucky could see his hurt, carefully guarded by a wall that the inventor built. Bucky smiled at him,

“Thanks, Stark,” he said, before running off.

***

Bruce was sitting opposite Bucky on the couch, nervously, sleeves pulled over his hands.

“Um, so what do my eyes look like?” Bruce asked nervously. His glasses were pushed into his curly hair. Bucky smiled at him,

“Like the chocolate chips in cookies,” he said.

“Really?” Bruce perked up, a warm smile on his face, “that’s nice.” Then his eyes flashed green, “what about now?” he asked lowly. Bucky did a double take,

“Err, green beer bottles.”

“Still pretty cool,” Bruce nodded, “go look at Thor’s eyes!”

So Bucky did.

“Bucky,” Thor boomed, “tell me. What do you see.”

“Thor, it’s not that deep,” Bucky sighed, but stared at the other man nonetheless, “they’re like…grey-blue…ish. Like a sky before a storm.”

Thor nodded in approval,

“What about me?” Clint demanded, plopping down in front of Bucky. The soldier directed his gaze at the agent, cocking his head to the side,

“Yours remind me of a galaxy.”

“But they’re just blue?” Clint said, confused.

“No.” Bucky shook his head, “they’re like…blue and green, with a bit of grey…”

***

“So what’s this I hear about you gazing into people’s eyes?” Steve asked, sauntering into Bucky’s room without knocking. The brunette closed his book,

“Yeah. Something my therapist came up with,” the brunette rolled his eyes, “it’s dumb.”

“You’re dumb,” Steve poked his cheek, sitting at his side. He leaned in, “gaze into my eyes, then.”

Bucky gulped but didn’t want to turn the offer down, in case Steve figured out that something fishy was going on.

“Okay.” The brunette shrugged, trying to act casual. He gazed into Steve’s blue eyes.

Steve’s eyes were a clear blue; like a bright winter morning when it’s freezing outside but the sun’s still shining. They were the color of the walls in Bucky’s and Steve’s apartment back in Brooklyn in the 40’s. They were intense, and full of sadness and misery and pain. Full of sorrow and regret, but so caring and soft and warm at the same time. So full of love.

Bucky was staring, but at least he had an excuse to do so.

“And?” Steve asked quietly, unconsciously leaning in closer, “what did everyone’s eyes remind you off?”

“N-Nat’s were like moss,” Bucky said shakily, eyes still glued to Steve’s, “Tony’s were kinda like a brick wall, Bruce’s were like c-chocolate chip cookies and b-bottles of beer,” Steve leaned in even closer, and his blue eyes flicked to Bucky’s lips before looking up again. Bucky swallowed, feeling his face flush, “Thor’s were l-like the sky, a-and Clint’s like a galaxy.”

“And mine?” Steve mused.

“L-Like a winter morning.” Bucky tried to stop his hands from shaking, “what about me? What do my eyes remind you off?”

Steve just smiled,

“They remind me of home,” he whispered, and then leaned forward to kiss Bucky.


	23. 'Cause after all this city never sleeps at night

**Day 23 – Birthdays**

 

Steve walked into their flat after a long day of helping out at the bakery. When he left in the morning, Bucky was already out at the docks, so Steve didn’t get to see him.

For once their flat was warm and dry. He seriously loved July, not only because it wasn’t cold outside, preventing him from getting sick, but also because it meant that it was his birthday month. And his birthday meant that his frail body survived one more year.

Bucky walked into their tiny Livingroom with a bright grin on his face. Steve put down the slice of cake he got at the bakery and then he was being tackled into a bear hug by his best friend.

“Happy birthday ya punk!” the brunette said, squeezing the life out of Steve, who was laughing.

“Thanks, jerk,” he said when Bucky pulled back. The brunette stood back and looked at Steve, smiling.

“I can’t believe you’re actually twenty one,” he said. Steve smiled, and shrugged,

“Yeah, I know.”

Bucky’s eyes softened and he pulled Steve into another hug, this time gentler, cradling Steve close as if he was something precious.

“I’m sorry I didn’t get you a present,” Bucky murmured, but he wasn’t sorry at all, because he knew that Steve _hated_ presents. The blonde hugged him back fiercely,

“It’s okay,” he said. Bucky kissed the top of his head,

“C’mon, I made dinner.” He said, pulling Steve towards the table.

“Let me wash my hands, first!” Steve complained, and somehow managed to twist his way around Bucky, sprinting to the bathroom. When he got back, he and Bucky sat down at their old table and dug into the two bowls of spaghetti that Bucky made.

“This is heavenly,” Steve moaned, “I freaking love you.”

Bucky smiled and looked at his food,

“Yeah, love ya too, punk.”

Before Steve could say much else, there was a knock on the door.

“Who’s that?” Steve asked, frowning. Bucky shrugged and walked to open it while Steve took the dirty dishes to the sink.

“Hey, Steve!” Bucky called and Steve walked back into the Livingroom. At the door stood Peggy Carter and Howard Stark.

“Happy birthday, little man!” Howard said, enveloping Steve in a massive hug and patting him heartily on the back,

“Thanks, Howard,” Steve said with a small smile. Peggy stepped forward with a smile and kissed the blonde’s cheek, “I didn’t know you guys were coming.”

“We were in the neighbourhood.” Howard shrugged and just then Steve noticed the massive bag he was holding. The man tossed it at Steve, who barely caught it, “we didn’t know what you wanted so we got you some random stuff.” He sang. Steve blushed and opened the box. He spied some books, colouring pencils, pastels, paint and a new sketchbook, alongside new shoes and a sweater.

“Howard!” Steve gaped, “how much did this cost?!”

“It doesn’t matter,” Howard ruffled Steve’s hair with a smile, “now! Peggy brought wine!”

“That I did,” Peggy produced a bottle, “Bucky! Would you do the honours?”

“Gladly,” Bucky smirked.

Later, when Howard and Peggy left, Steve snuck into Bucky’s bed.

“Hey, there,” Bucky said, waking up at once. It was dark in the room, and stifling hot, so Bucky slept without his covers. Or his shirt. Steve cuddled into his side, and the brunette slung an arm around his waist. “Happy birthday,” he said, again, kissing Steve’s forehead.

***

“Happy birthday, Rogers!” Timothy “Dum Dum” Dugan roared, bright smile on his face, as he handled Steve a bottle of whiskey.

“Thanks, man,” Steve grinned. He was still getting used to his new life; his new, large body, his new army friends. The fact that he wasn’t in his hot apartment in Brooklyn right now, but in a tent at a camp.

“How old are ya turning, Cap?” Gabe Jones asked, handing Steve a packet of cigarettes, even though the blonde didn’t smoke,

“Twenty three.” Steve said, feeling a bit awkward from all the attention. Most of the soldiers were gathered in his tent, singing and drinking as the radio played loudly in the background. Steve sat, surrounded by his squadron.

“Man, I wish Bucky was here,” Jaques Dernier sighed, taking a sip from his bottle of beer. Steve flinched,

“Oi! Shut up!” James Falsworth said, whacking him upside the head, “we’ll get Bucky back.”

“Yeah, sure,” Jim Morita snorted. Everyone glared at him, “I mean, we will! We will!”

Later, when all the soldiers went to their own tents, and Steve’s tent-mates were asleep, Captain America remembered his twenty first birthday, the night in his boiling Brooklyn apartment, with Bucky’s arms around him.

***

“Give it up for Captain America, who’s turning one hundred and two today!” Tony roared into the microphone and the massive crowd gathered in the Avengers tower cheered. Steve quickly snatched the mike off of Tony,

“Actually! I’m turning twenty four…”

“…he’s turning one hundred and sixteen, my bad!” Tony snatched the mike back and grinned at Steve. He then whispered to him, “you’re Captain America, they don’t care how old you are,” before walking off the stage and disappearing in the crowd, presumably to get more drunk than he already was. Steve sighed, smiled at the crowd, and then also disappeared amongst the people.

His head pounded from the loud music, and the hundreds of ‘happy birthday!” ‘s screamed in his ear. He weaved his way among the people until he made it to the staircase, and sneaked away to his dark room before anyone realized.

At times like these, Steve was really glad for the soundproof walls. He collapsed on his bed and then turned to face the stack of meaningless presents that he got from fans, as well as the stuff he got from the Avengers, all illuminated by the lanterns from outside.

Nat got him a really nice, brown leather jacket that reminded him of the old times, Bruce got him a potted plant (bit random but it was cute), Clint got him a ‘hilarious’ t-shirt with Steve’s own face on it and ‘Captain America’s no.1 fan’ written on the back. Tony _bought_ Steve an island (great) and Thor just gave Steve flowers, still not too sure on the Earth’s culture.

Steve sighed and closed his eyes. He loved his friends, but sometimes they were a bit much.

The door opened and noise spilled in from outside, before the door was shut again quickly. Bucky was standing there, smiling.

“Happy birthday, punk,” he said.

“Thanks, jerk,” Steve smiled and scooted up against the wall so Bucky could lie down next to him. The air con was on, so Steve’s room was pleasantly warm, but not too hot, like his old flat in Brooklyn. Still, Bucky slung his arm around Steve’s waist and smiled.

“Sorry I didn’t get you a present.” He whispered.

“It’s okay,” Steve said.


	24. Pray for me brother

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Steve's being himself. Kind of.

**Day 24 – With cat ears**

 

"Steve open the damn door," Bucky sighed, leaning his forehead against the wood.

"No!" Steve mumbled, but Bucky could hear him perfectly through the thin walls of their flat.

"Why not?"

"T-They injected me with something weird...said it was a mixup but...," Steve sounded like he was about to cry.

"Steve, just open the door and let me help," Bucky commanded, sudden worry flooding him. What if Steve was hurt...

"Promise not to laugh?" Steve whispered.

"Promise." Bucky said. The door creaked open really slowly. Steve appeared in the semi darkness, staring at the ground, his long eyelashes casting shadows over his pale cheeks. He looked pretty normal, in one of Bucky's rumpled jumpers with his hair moved to one side.

Except there were two furry, honey blonde ears poking out from the top of his head.

"Oh my God."

"I'm a fucking _cat_ ," Steve whined. There were tears in his eyes, "Bucky, I'm a fucking cat."

Bucky stared at him, his cheeks growing red.

"Y-You're adorable," he spluttered eventually. Steve glared at him,

"If you laugh I swear to God..."

"I won't! I won't!" Bucky raised his hands in surrender, "so what do we do now?"

"I want milk," Steve mumbled.

"We don't have any milk," Bucky informed him,

"I want milk." Steve said stubbornly.

"Stevie, it's the middle of the-" Bucky cut off abruptly when he saws Steve's glare. He sighed, "fine. I'll see if Mrs Wilson has any. Wait here, don't go anywhere."

***

When Bucky came back with a glass bottle of milk and an apple pie (Mrs Wilson loved to feed the boys) he found Steve curled up on their tiny couch, hugging his face into Bucky's sleeping shirt.

"What are you doing?" Bucky asked.

"Everything stinks," Steve mumbled, curling himself into a tighter ball, "everything except your stuff. Your stuff smells really nice."

"I brought your milk," Bucky said, ignoring Steve's remark. He passed it to the boy who snatched it up and gulped it down hungrily. Bucky watched as a droplet of the white liquid sneaked its way out of Steve's lips and slid down his chin.

Bucky gulped, suddenly feeling really weird.

Steve put the bottle down, and then climbed into Bucky's lap.

"W-What are you doing?!" Bucky spluttered.

"I'm cold. You're warm. Shut up," Steve grumbled. Apparently he was even more moody as a cat. Bucky tensed as Steve curled up on his legs, pressing his face into the crook of the brunette's neck. After a second, Bucky hesitantly wrapped his arms around Steve, pressing him closer to his chest. It actually felt kind of nice.

And then Steve started purring.

"Fuck." Bucky said under his breath.

"What?" Steve grumbled.

"Nothing." Bucky said quickly. He looked down at Steve, "can I touch your ears?"

"Go on then," Steve's eyes fluttered closed. He looked like he was about to fall asleep. Slowly, Bucky brought his hand up to touch Steve's cat ears.

They felt like normal cat ears, warm and kind of weird, with a nice, soft layer of fur on top of them. Bucky smiled despite himself and ran his hands through Steve's blonde hair before rubbing the base of one of his ears. Steve started purring again and pressed himself closer to Bucky, smiling happily.

"Steve. Are you going to fall asleep?" Bucky asked quietly.

"If you keep rubbing my ears I will," Steve yawned. Bucky dropped his hand and the blonde's eyes snapped open. He glared at Bucky.

"What?" Bucky asked innocently, "I'm not gonna rub your ears all damn night."

"Fine then," Steve grumbled. He tapped his cheek with his finger, "gimme a kiss then."

"A kiss?" Bucky raised an eyebrow. Steve blinked at him, his eyes sleepy, his ears twitching. The brunette rolled his eyes but leaned forward in order to brush his lips against Steve's cheek.

The blonde turned his head so that his and Bucky's lips met. Bucky sucked in a startled breath and Steve wrapped his arms tightly around his neck, holding onto him tightly. After his initial shock passed, Bucky found that he actually enjoyed kissing Steve, so he rested his hands on Steve's tiny waist and licked his way into his mouth.

"None of that now!" Steve pulled away. His eyelids dropping. He settled back down into Bucky's lap, pressing his face against the confused brunette's shoulder, "and now, rub my fucking ears Bucky."


	25. Just wouldn't settle in

**Day 25 - Sick Fic**

Steve finished his first coffee. Tony finished his eighth. The blonde rubbed the back of his head,

"Has anyone seen Bucky?" he asked.

"He's not up yet, I think," Wanda said. Steve frowned; usually Bucky waited for him in the living room early in the morning so the two could go for their run. This morning, Steve thought that Bucky might've been too tired, and when he didn't show up, he went by himself. And now he was worried - Bucky never slept for this long. 

"I'll go check up on him," Cap said to the rest of the avengers, and then climbed the stairs up to the second floor. He walked slowly to Bucky's door and then knocked. There was no reply so Steve just opened the door. 

"Bucky?" he asked, directing the question at the figure under the pile of covers, "You alright, buddy?" Steve frowned when he heard a sniffle, and the gently sat down on the edge of the bed. He tentatively reached out to touch where he assumed Bucky's back was. 

A hand shot out and grabbed his. The skin was sweaty and burning hot and feverish. 

"Steve?" Bucky croaked, his face peering out from beneath the pillows. He looked paler than usual, and ushaved. His eyes were red and so was his nose and cheeks. He looked sleepy and unfocused.

"Are you sick?!" Steve asked, pressing a hand to Bucky boiling forehead, "Ah, shit, you're burning up."

"'m fine," Bucky protested, but Steve was already fusing over him. He made him sit up and then called Bruce up to check on him. The Doctor touched his forehead and measured his blood pressure and then decided that it was just a cold; some fever and a runny nose. Tony found some antibiotics and Bucky took them, grumbling, before lying back down to sleep. "You can go, you know," the brunette huffed. Steve was sitting on one side of the bed, reading a book. 

"No," he said, "I want to make sure you're alright."

"I'm just gonna sleep, ya punk," Bucky sighed. 

"Then sleep," Steve rolled his eyes and then added, "punk."

*** 

Steve must've dozed off because the next thing he knew was that he was bolting upright, woken by Bucky's coughs. 

"Buck?" he said, turning the other man over onto his back, "Buck?! Are you okay?"

Bucky stopped coughing and blinked sleep out of his eyes,

"What? Yeah," he waved Steve off, "I'm fine." 

"I'm worried," Steve hovered over him, unsure what to do. His expression was soft, but there were frown lines between his brows. Bucky reached out and smoothed them with his burning fingers. 

"I'm a bit cold," Bucky admitted. "Can you cuddle me?"

"Yeah, alright," Steve said. He put his book to the side and slipped underneath the covers. Bucky immediately turned his body toward the blonde, pressing his face into the crook of Steve's neck with a content sigh. Steve smiled and wrapped his arms around Bucky, pulling him close. It was like hugging a portable heater, but Steve didn't mind. 

Bucky sniffled. Steve kissed his forehead. Bucky froze. 

"W-What are you doing?!" he breathed. 

"Er...checking your tempature," Steve said quickly, panicked. He didn't mean to do that - it was just that Bucky was so close and so warm and Steve just wanted to touch- "you still have a fever."

"Oh." Bucky mumbled, lips brushing against Steve's neck accidently. The blonde surpressed a shiver,

"How are you feeling?" he asked, voice coming out a bit hoarse. Bucky shrugged,

"My throat hurts. And my head," he said, snuggling closer to Steve. "Can you check my tempature again?"

"Um...," Steve looked unsure, "Okay?" He hesitantly leaned down to kiss Bucky's forehead, but the man was faster, shooting up so that Steve ended up kissing him on the lips. Bucky grinned wickedly when Steve squeaked, 

"So, doc. Do I still have a tempature?" he asked. 

"I...um...e-er," Steve stuttered, face red, arms still full of Bucky. The brunette smiled,

"Right." He grinned, "night, doc," he said, snuggling back against Steve. The blonde sighed, not knowing what to make of the whole situation, but then he just decided to fuck it, kissed the top of Bucky's head and fell asleep. 

*** 

In the morning he woke up with a blocked nose and a sore throat, and Bucky was fine.


	26. This is the New Year

**Day 26 - New Years**

 

"Woohoo!" Bucky screamed into the chilly night air, arms spread wide, a bright grin on his face. A firework exploded over his head, illuminating his face red and green, and Steve smiled, taking another sip out of the cider bottle he was holding. Bucky looked wild, with his short, wavy hair a mess on top of his head and his bright eyes twinkling in his handsome face. He didn't just look wild, he  _was_ wild, the wildest person Steve knew.

And the kindest and most gorgeous and bravest...

Steve averted his eyes, not wanting his best friend to catch him staring. He seemed to always be staring nowadays. Bucky climbed down from where he was standing on the balcony, and lowered himself to sit next to Steve, his legs sticking out from between the holes of the iron balustrade. The brunette grinned at him, 

"Lighten up, Stevie," he ruffled the blonde's hair, "it's the new year! Another year we've been together, ain't ya happy?"

"Yeah," Steve offered him a smile, "I'm happy, Buck." he said. Bucky's eyes softened and he reached into his pocket, pulling out a cigarette. 

"Last one. Wanna split it?" he asked. Steve shook his head,

"Nah. You know I hate the taste it leaves in my mouth," he said, breath making a cloud in the freezing night air without the help of the smoke. Steve smiled a bit sadly, feeling nostalgic for some reason. Tonight was meant to be a wild, crazy night, and instead it was quiet and calm. Only Bucky was wild, but then again, he always was. It was a quiet goodbye, even with the fireworks exploding overhead. 

Steve watched, out of the corner of his eye, as Bucky lit his cigarette. He was clean shaven, hair slicked back, out of his face. His dark eyes twinkled as he produced a box of matches from his pocket and lit one. For a second Steve's breath caught and he swore that Bucky's eyes were brighter than the lights in the sky, but then the flame died down, leaving only the tiny embers at the end of Bucky's cigarette. The brunette inhaled deeply, eyes fluttering closed. Steve looked up, at the night sky, and saw the cloud of smoke travel upwards until it dispersed. 

A champagne bottle popped somewhere down below, and laughter rang out. Bucky opened his eyes and took another drag of the cigarette. Time seemed to slow down, or maybe it was just Steve's brain, desperately trying to prolong the night. He wanted it to last forever and he dreaded what dawn would bring. The blonde blinked back tears that threatened to spill down his cheeks, not wanting to ruin the few precious hours that he and Bucky still had together. The boy took a gulp of the beer in his bottle, enjoying the bitter taste and burn as it travelled down his throat. 

"Don't be greedy," Bucky said, and pulled the bottle out of Steve's hand, taking a gulp himself while holding his cigarette in his free hand. Steve rested his forehead against the cold iron in front of him. Bucky placed the beer bottle in between them and the blonde didn't reach for it again. 

"How much time?" Steve whispered, not being able to stand it anymore. Bucky glanced at the watch on his wrist,

"Two hours."

"Oh."

"Steve-" Bucky started, and his voice faltered. Steve forced a smile and then took the cigarette from Bucky's hand, taking a drag. He began coughing, the smoke burning his throat, his eyes watering. He covered his mouth with his hand, his eyes squeezed shut, while Bucky cracked a smile and patted his back, taking the cigarette back and finishing it quickly. 

The beer was done as well, Steve took the last sip. The two sat there in silence and Bucky dropped the butt of the cigarette down. It sailed through the air and magically the embers of the fire reminded lit as it smashed against the pavement below. It spluttered and died. Steve stood up and walked into the kitchen. He went to the fridge. A song was playing softly on the radio, as Steve reached for the tub of cheap ice cream that he and Bucky bought for tonight. He grabbed two spoons and came back out onto the balcony.

Bucky switched positions, now facing the inside of their flat, his back against the railing. Steve sat down next to him, stretching his legs out in front of him. He held the ice cream tub in his lap and wordlessly offered Bucky a spoon. The brunette took it and Steve pried open the tub, revealing the vanilla goodness underneath. Bucky had the first spoonful, scooping it into his mouth. Steve didn't look at him as he too ate a spoonful. It tasted watery in his mouth, tasteless, but Steve didn't care. Not now.

They finished the entire tub in the next half an hour, neither of them speaking. By the end, Steve was shivering, feeling as if an ice cube had appeared in his chest. He hoped he didn't get a cold...

"We should go inside," Bucky offered finally. 

"I thought you wanted to see the fireworks," Steve said. 

"No," Bucky shrugged, "'s alright. I saw them already, now come on, punk, before you freeze to death. I bet the neighbours opposite can see your shivers."

Steve rolled his eyes but stood up and followed Bucky inside the flat, shutting the door to the balcony. Bucky sat down on the couch. It was old and battered but neither him nor Steve wanted to get rid of it. It faced the empty, cracked wall, because the two never saved up enough to buy a television - the money was always needed for something else like medicine or to fix the crack in the ceiling or food...

Steve flicked off the light and sat down on the couch, next to his best friend. The brunette wrapped an arm around his shoulders and pulled him towards him, so Steve's face was pressed into the crook of his neck, knees resting on Bucky's legs. Steve closed his eyes, enjoying the boy's warmth, probably for the last time. Bucky exhaled. 

"I'm sorry," he whispered into the darkness.

"Don't be," Steve's words were almost drowned out by the firework explosion outside the window. Bucky pulled him closer.

"You know if I could...I'd...you know...," he tried, unable to find the words. Steve took his hand and squeezed it. 

"I'm not angry." He said, "It's okay, I understand."

Bucky sighed, but he didn't say anything, instead resting his cheek on top of Steve's head. 

"We'll get a TV," he said. 

"Okay," Steve smiled slightly,

"We will." Bucky said determinedly. Steve could feel his heartbeat and he pulled away,

"You should start getting ready." He said, not looking at the brunette.

"Yeah," Bucky agreed, gingerly standing up and walking into the bedroom. The lights were still off and in the dark Steve felt safer as tears pooled in his eyes. But the time still wasn't right. The boy rubbed his eyes furiously and then stood up, flicking the light on. In the brightness his tears disappeared quickly. The boy busied himself with re-arranging all the bits and pieces around the living room, changing the order of things on the table, washing the two mugs that he and Bucky drank from hours earlier. The door to the bedroom opened and Bucky came outside,

"So?" he said nervously. Steve looked up. Bucky was wearing his dark green uniform, complete with the hat. "How do I look?" he asked, smoothing the fabric down. Steve bit back his tears, 

"Wonderful," he said sincerely, "like a real soldier."

Bucky offered him a crooked grin. It was lightening outside - dawn was finally here. Where did the time go? The twenty three years with Bucky? Steve wondered. It was just a blink of an eye and Steve always took the brunette for granted. 

It was always Bucky and Steve, Steve and Bucky. And now it was just Steve...

The blonde shrugged on his coat, refusing to cry. He switched off the radio, cutting it off mid-song. Silence descended on their flat and when Steve turned the light off it wasn't dark anymore, the light pink hue coming out outside. It was over. It was the new year, the first year without Bucky. 

"Let's go," Steve said, voice rough, and pulled his shoes on. Bucky did the same, and grabbed his bag, slinging it over one shoulder. He opened the door and held it ajar for Steve, who walked out into their cold corridor. "You've got everything?"

"Yeah," Bucky closed the door. His hand lingered slightly on the wood, and Steve saw the sadness in his eyes. And then they were running downstairs, feet thudding against the metal, probably waking up all the neighbours. 

Outside Brooklyn seemed to be asleep. Mist snaked itself around Steve's and Bucky's feet as they hurried through the alleyways, all those alleyways that they once fought in. Steve smiled. He already missed it, even with Bucky still at his side. As if sensing his sadness, Bucky took Steve's hand in his. And it was okay - nobody was outside except the two of them. Nobody would see. 

The station was more crowded, with soldiers and their sweethearts and their families, and Bucky regretfully let Steve go. The blonde went with him as far as the train, a bright red monster easing smoke onto the station, ready to snatch Steve's Bucky away. The blonde hated the thing and he hated the uniform. His hands clenched into fists. 

"Steve. You're gonna catch a cold," Bucky told him.

"I want to see you off," Steve said, throat tight. Soldiers were stepping onto the train now, it was almost over. A dark skinned man ran up to Bucky, 

"James!" he exclaimed happily, clapping the brunette on the shoulder. Bucky brightened up, 

"Gabe!" he pulled the man into a hug, both of them laughing. Something clenched inside Steve. 

 _What if he forgets about me?_ he thought. 

"Steve!" Bucky said, "this is Gabe Jones, he's in the army too. Gabe, this is Steve Rogers, my best friend."

"Nice to meet ya!" Gabe grinned and shook Steve's hand. The blonde managed a smile,

"Take care of him, alright?" he asked. Gabe's smile widened,

"Of course I will!" a whistle came up from the train, "we should get on."

"In a minute," Bucky said. Gabe nodded,

"Alright," he ran down, then he turned, "Happy new year Steve!"

Steve waved at him, then he turned to Bucky. The brunette pulled him into a fierce, bone crushing hug, arms wrapped around Steve tightly. The blonde hugged him back just as hard, face buried in Bucky's shoulder. Bucky kissed his cheek, carefully, so nobody saw. Steve's heart skipped a beat.

"Wait for me, Steve," Bucky pulled away to look into Steve's eyes. The blonde smiled,

"I will, don't worry you jerk."

Bucky glanced down at Steve's lips but it wasn't the right place, too many people. Steve pulled away, 

"See ya soon, Buck."

"See you," Bucky murmured, his eyes saying so much more, even though he couldn't. 

_I love you._

Steve watched Bucky jump into one of the carriages, and he hugged himself. Minutes later all the soldiers disappeared inside, leaving behind sobbing dames. Steve watched the train pull out, spewing smoke, and disappear around the bend. 

Steve trailed home, up the street that was slowly waking up, then back to his flat and up the stairs. He opened his and Bucky's flat door, just his now, and dropped the keys into a bowl. The apartment was quiet and cold. Steve's beer was still out on the balcony, alongside the empty ice cream bucket and the two spoons. Steve walked into Bucky's room and as the sun began its ascend, he laid down on the brunette's bed, huddled in his covers, staring at his wall, and Steve cried. 


	27. Hey there Delilah

**Day 27 - Reunions**

 

The smoke was irritating Steve's nose and eyes and lungs, and it was just irritating  _him._ Steve's mood was already pretty shit, but then again, it has been for the past two years. Yup, two years and Bucky fucking Barnes was still not dead. The fucker wasn't dead, of course he fucking wasn't, but he wasn't home, thinking his shitty letters would keep the chill out of the flat and dry Steve's tears. Fucking twat.

Yeah, Steve was in a pretty shit mood since Bucky left. The blonde sighed as he climbed the unstable staircase to his flat. He opened the door and toed of his shoes and dropped the shopping bag off in the kitchen, before he realized something was wrong. Something was really, really wrong. Steve froze and slowly scanned the dark flat - he felt someone presence there, but it was hard to pinpoint. 

Steve's heartbeat picked up and he felt his hands begin to sweat. He thought that maybe it was a good idea to inch his way back to the front door and run off, call the police, but then he decided against it. Either he was just being paranoid and he'd only make a fool of himself, or the someone in his flat already knew he was there. Steve swallowed and flipped the radio on to give himself some courage. Nothing was as scary with some Elvis Presley...

Steve noticed the baseball bat in the corner of the kitchen and he quickly grabbed it before walking out into the dark living room. 

"H-Hello?" he called, voice shaking. The shadows on the walls looked terrifying, grotesque, twisted, it didn't look like home. Steve felt panic grow in his heart and then...

And then one of the shadows shifted and Steve swore he had a heart attack. He froze in place, his baseball bat lifted slightly, but the fear kept him rooted to the carpet. There was someone in his flat and Steve was too skinny and weak to defend himself. When Bucky came back - if - he would find the apartment looted and Steve dead. But why would anyone want to break into  _this_ flat?! Steve thought as the shadows came closer, there was nothing valuable in his flat. 

And then the shadow gently took paralyzed Steve into its arms. The bat clambered out of Steve's hands and everything  _clicked._ There were no signs of a break in inside the flat and the only other person who had keys...and then there was that smell; cheap cologne and beer and sweat and mint. And those arms, strong but gentle, aware of the damage they could inflinct on Steve's weak body. 

"B-Bucky." Steve whispered, awestruck and unable to comprehend what he was witnessing.

_Bucky was home._

The brunette's arms squeezed him slightly, 

"I'm home, Stevie."

Steve stumbled away from his roommate and ran to the lightswitch. The second light flooded the livingroom the blonde realized that yes, indeed it was Bucky. There was a small scar near his eye and he had a two day stubble on his chin and cheeks and he was wearing his uniform and his hair was slightly longer but it was  _Bucky._

Without a warning, Steve threw himself at the man and Bucky caught him with a surprised sound. 

"You're home, oh my God, Bucky you  _jerk,"_ Steve gasped as he clung onto his friend, back in his safe arms. Bucky chuckled and kissed the top of Steve's head,

"God I missed you, punk," he murmured, and pulled away slightly. The two stared at each other for second, grinning and breathless for some weird reason. Tears of happiness filled Steve's arms and Bucky's smile softened, "Hey, don't cry."

"I'm not," Steve sniffed and looked away. Bucky folded him into his arms again, "I'm just really happy to see you. I missed you so much, you don't even know."

"Oh trust me," Bucky muttered, "I know. All those nights in the cold, wet trenches when all I wanted was to curl myself around you-" Bucky stopped abruptly, realizing what he just said. Steve also froze, heart beating so fast that he thought Bucky's must've felt it against his own chest. The brunette started pulling away but Steve grabbed his hands, intertwining their fingers, and then he stood on his tiptoes, pecking Bucky on the lips.

"I missed you too, Buck," he said sweetly. 


	28. Cool for the Summer

**Day 28 - Holidays**

 

It was Natasha's idea. Bucky was officially pardoned and living in the Avenger's tower, but he wouldn't let anyone near him, not even Steve. So Natasha proposed that they all went away for a few days, away from the prying, hungry eyes of the public waiting to see what would happen next between Captain America and his long, lost buddy, the Winter Soldier. Of course Tony had to pay for everything, but he didn't really mind. 

"Bora Bora," Bruce read from the leaflet left onboard the private jet that the avengers were currently in, "known as the ‘pearl of Polynesia’, is just a 45 minute flight from Papeete, with silky beaches set against the emerald backdrop of Mount Otemanu: truly a perfect place for a South Pacific idyll."

"What the fuck is a Papeetee?" Tony asked, on his second glass of scotch. Bruce glared at him but before he could say anything, Clint popped in from the pilot's cabin. Because they wanted to keep their destination a secret, Clint and Natasha decided to pilot the plane, and only Pepper knew where they were heading. 

Steve was sitting in the back, as near to Bucky as he dared, watching the sleeping brunette with a frown. 

"Guys, we're nearly there, so buckle up," Clint warned. Thor pointedly ignored him, staring out of the window and fiddling with anything he could touch, muttering; 'mortal stuff, mortal stuff' under his breath. Bruce, on the other hand, hadn't undone his seatbelt for the whole flight. Steve followed Clint's instruction, never taking his eyes off Bucky. 

"Oi," Tony leaned over and flicked his forehead, "stop frowning or you'll get wrinkles."

"Shut up," Steve grumbled, taking his eyes of his once best friend and sighing. He stared out of the window sulking, throughout the whole descent. Bruce prayed in about six different languages even as the jet landed smoothly. The next two hours were a mess of arguing over seating arrangements in the limo (Bucky only wanted to sit next to Nat), threats and naps as they made it to their mansion. 

But it was all worth it. The mansion waiting for the Avengers was made of pale white stone, with large windows letting in the shimmering sunlight and a garden full of beautiful flowers and a massive pool. Right below the house was a white-sanded beach with a sapphire sea just waiting to be jumped into. 

Natasha didn't bother checking out the house. She opened the first door she could find, chucked her bag inside and stripped off her clothes, revealing a red swimsuit beneath it. Clint gave her a look and she just shrugged, 

"What? I always come prepared." Was all she said. Clint rolled his eyes and everyone rummaged through their bags, looking for swimming trunks. 

"I'm going to nap," Bucky grumbled and then slipped into one of the rooms before anyone could protest. Steve's shoulders slumped and he sighed,

"Let him be," Bruce said, putting a hand on the blonde's shoulder, "he needs to get used to all of this. You hovering around him isn't going to help."

"Yeah," Clint agreed, already changed, "come down to the beach with us and have some fun for once."

* * *

 

Steve really did try. He swam in the ocean for a bit and had hand-made ice cream and sunbathed with Bruce, listening to him spill scientific facts. But when they all started playing beach volleyball, Steve full out told them that he was tired and was going to check on Bucky. They didn't protest too much, knowing how important the brunette was to Steve, so they let him go.

Cap trekked back up the cliff to the house and slipped inside the cool interior. It was much nicer inside than in the blazing heat of the afternoon outside. Steve bit his lip and thought about calling out to Bucky, but he didn't want to scare the other man. Instead, he decided he'll just change, grab a drink from the fridge and watch TV or something. 

However his plan fell apart when he stepped into his room. Bucky was sitting on his bed, and he had a photo album in his lap. Steve froze, he knew what was in the album and he always brought it with him for sentimental reasons; there was a photograph of him when he was seven with his mother, and then when he was twelve with Bucky. There were several pictures of him back when he was skinny, and Bucky before he became a soldier. There was a photograph of Peggy and his whole squad back in the war. Then it was all Natasha and Bruce and Tony and Thor, and Pepper and Jane and Rodney, Wanda and Sam and Pietro. It was as if seventy years of his life were completely cut out. 

"What are you doing?" Steve asked. Bucky jumped and the album tumbled out of his hands, 

"N-Nothing!" the brunette stuttered. Steve smiled and picked up the album, he held it out to Bucky, who stared at him with wide eyes, before taking the album. 

"Bucky," Steve said softly, "I won't hurt you." Bucky didn't reply, just looked away, "Do you want a soft drink?"

"What?" Bucky mumbled. 

"Do you want a bottle of coke?" Steve tried again. Bucky looked uncertain, but then he nodded slowly. Steve smiled and then sprinted downstairs, grabbing two cans of coke and making it back to Bucky in record time. The blonde sat down on the floor to make himself seem less threatening, and passed one of the cans to Bucky. The brunette looked at it uncertainly and then bit his lip,

"What is this?" he asked. Steve blinked,

"It's a can of coke," he explained quickly, "you open it like this," he demonstrated on his own can. When it hissed a bit, Bucky flinched. Steve took a sip to show that it was harmless and then watched Bucky struggle with his own can, the tip of his tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth adorably. "Here," Steve slowly, putting his can down, "let me."

He pushed himself up and sat down next to Bucky. He left the can in the man's hands and just opened it. When the can hissed Bucky jumped and spilled the coke all over himself. 

"S-Shit," he said shakily, "sorry."

Steve smiled, "no worries," he said. He walked to the bathroom and brought back a towel. He offered it to Bucky, but the brunette didn't move. "Do you mind if I do it?" Steve asked gently. Bucky shook his head. The blonde knelt in front of him again and he unbuttoned his shirt. Bucky let him and he shivered when Steve slipped the shirt off. The man started to clean the liquid off of Bucky's chest gently, and the brunette didn't move away, which Steve counted as an improvement. 

Steve looked up when he felt eyes on him. Bucky was staring at him and he looked really unsure. Very slowly he raised his hand and touched Steve's cheek. The blonde smiled at him and then went back to wiping his chest. He let Bucky ran his hand through his hair and down his arm. When he retracted his hand, Steve offered him his own shirt because it was the closest. Bucky slipped it on, his face red.

"It's okay," Steve said gently. Bucky looked at him shyly and bit his lip, "Do you want to go down to the beach?"

"Yeah, alright," Bucky said hoarsely. He slipped a hoodie so nobody would see his metal arm and then the two boys walked out of the house. It was cooler now that the sun was setting and Steve smiled. He could see the Avengers sun bathing down below.

"Hey," he turned to Bucky, "do you want to go up to the cliffs instead?" he pointed to the cliffs stretching out next to them. Bucky nodded. The two walked side by side but not touching, and Steve talked about everything and nothing at all, feeling his heart grown from happiness because Bucky was talking to him again. The two didn't get tired climbing and by the time they reached the tallest cliff the sun was disappearing behind the waves.

"Seems like the end of the world," Bucky muttered. Steve smiled and looked over at him. Bucky looked all soft in this lighting, with his hair framing his face. He turned his head to look at Steve and  _smiled._ Then he reached out and shyly took Steve's hand. The blonde smiled, "Thanks, punk," Bucky mumbled. Steve squeezed his hand and turned back to the ocean,

"It's alright, jerk."


	29. I wanna fuck you all the time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 29 - NSFW

**Day 29 - NSFW**

Steve knew he was an Omega as long as Bucky knew he was an Alpha, but it never changed anything between them. Even though Steve disappeared for a few days each month and came out weaker than normal, and Bucky got weirdly possessive, it didn't change anything. 

They moved in together, and then things got...hard. Bucky was twenty one, a strong, big Alpha. He worked at the docks and got enough money to pay for his and Steve's shitty little apartment. He went dancing and took girls to bed, Omega, Betas, the whole lot. Steve was weak and easily got sick, he sat at home and painted or cooked, or slept.

He went into heats once a month. The first time it happened Bucky didn't know what to do. He panicked when he saw Steve curled up on the bed, flushed and panting and moaning, hands fisted in the blankets. He panicked because when he saw his best friend like that, something stirred in him and he got so hard it hurt. He sprinted out of the house and found a pretty girl in a bar and let her take him home. He fucked her into the mattress and tried to forget Steve's face. 

When he came home three days later, Bucky saw that Steve was exhausted, dark bags under his eyes, but his heat had passed. He didn't hold it against Bucky, that the boy had disappeared, and things went back to normal. Bucky counted the weaks and he day before Steve's next heat, Bucky went into town and found an Alpha. He was a nice lad, tall and clean-looking, with chestnut hair and soft grey eyes. Bucky's heart felt heavy when he led him home, but Steve was glad. He let the Alpha into his room and closed the door, and left Bucky to sit on the couch, face in his hands as he listened to his friend scream and moan and gasp. The walls were thin.

It had been two years. Every month Bucky found Steve an Alpha and let them fuck his best friend until he couldn't walk, all the time feeling anger and jealousy grow inside of him, bubble under his skin. All he ever wanted was to take Steve to bed with him, to hold and kiss and fuck him, so he never needed anybody else. He hated having to hear someone else take Steve, because it hurt Buck to admit but he was in love with him. 

He couldn't deny it; Steve was the perfect Omega, tiny and pretty like a doll. But he also had a sharp tongue and was witty and funny and understood Bucky like nobody else. And Bucky  _wanted_ him.

* * *

Bucky came home, sweaty and dirty from a hard day at the decks. The lights were off in the hallway as both the boys liked to save electricity. So Steve's and Bucky's tiny flat was small and dark as the brunette shrugged his shoes off and dropped his keys into a bowl.

"Steve?" he called as he shrugged off his jacket, draping it over the hanger. He walked down the short hallway and into the living room. There was a soft glow coming from the candles on the table but Bucky barely noticed that because the  _smell_ hit him and he felt heat shoot from his body.

Steve looked up when Bucky came in, and the brunette realized the second he saw him.  _He's in heat._

"I'll find you an alpha," he said immediately, turning to the door, feeling heat shoot through him, "there's plenty, I'm sure one will take you on short notice. I'll be back so-" he turned to face Steve, to reassure him, but the smell was too much. Steve smelled like paint and mint and sex and  _want._ The blonde stood in the middle of the living room, wearing Bucky's shirt and nothing else. It was too big on him, falling to Steve's mid-thigh, slipping off one shoulder, revealing pale, flawless skin. His face was flushed red, his blue eyes almost black with lust. His lips were swollen where he bit them and his blonde hair messy, falling into his eyes. He looked like somebody already fucked him.

_Go. Go before you do something you regret!_

Bucky felt his wolf growl with want, demanding Bucky to  _claim_ Steve, to make him his. But he knew he couldn't, that would ruin everything and Steve would hate him after his heat passed. He would hate him because Bucky was his best friend=

But fuck, Bucky wanted him. 

"Bucky," Steve whimpered, hands gripping the shirt, "don't go."

"I have to," Bucky was gripping the door knob to try and ground himself and force himself to leave. Somehow it felt different this time, "Stevie you know I have to."

"No," Steve whined. He was unsteady on his feet, and Bucky knew his thighs were wet with slick, "Bucky p-please I dont want a stranger alpha again, I want _you."_

"S-Steve don't say that," Bucky growled, "you know you don't mean it."

Steve's knees buckled and he would've hit the floor but Bucky caught him in seconds. He realized his mistake too late. Steve was in his arms, warm and pliant and willing, his smell intoxicating. Bucky wanted to pull away but the blonde moaned against his neck and pressed himself into Bucky, and the brunette lost it.

He gripped Steve's face in his hands and then he crashed their lips together. The Omega let out a moan the second their mouths met and his hands tangled in Bucky's hair. The blonde parted his lips and let Bucky slip his tongue inside his mouth without hesitation, as if he had been waiting for it. The blonde's mouth was hot and wet, he tasted like cinnamon and apples. Bucky kissed him hungrily, desperately, licking inside Steve's mouth, curling their tongues together. Steve was trembling against him, he was so warm, as if he had a fever-

Bucky regained some of his senses and he pulled away quickly, scrambling away until his back hit the wall. The look Steve gave him almost broke his heart. He looked so  _lost._

"B-Bucky?" He asked, a lock of his hair falling into his eyes, "w-what's wrong?"

"We can't do this," Bucky was surprised at how hoarse his voice sounded. Steve shivered and then he gave Bucky a desperate look.

"Please," he whimpered and Bucky's mouth went dry, "j-just this o-once please, j-just take me..."

But Bucky knew that that wouldn't be the case. If he had Steve once, he's be addicted, he'd never let anyone near him again. And Steve would hate him for it.

"No Stevie."

Steve had tears in his eyes and he looked like he was in pain. He also looked defeated.

"'m sorry," he clutched the wall for support as his legs shook, "'m sorry for a-asking." He wasn't looking at Bucky, and it hurt. The brunette cleared his throat,

"Should I get an Alpha?" He asked quietly.Steve shook his head weakly,

"Just...h-help me to the b-bed, please?"

Bucky was by his side in seconds, slipping his arm around the blonde's skinny waist and breathing through his mouth so he didn't smell him. The boy was like a feather at his side. Somehow he managed to get Steve to his bed without pouncing on him. He watched the trembling blonde climb under the blankets.

"Will you be alright?" Bucky asked softly, trying to ignore his own cock which was throbbing in his pants. Steve nodded, staring at the wall, his cheeks red, eyes half-closed. The brunette sighed and slid into his own bed, wondering how he'd ever fall asleep.

* * *

The next thing Bucky knew was that he was waking up to Steve's tiny, breathy moans.

"B-Bucky," Steve's voice was barely above a whisper and for a second the brunette thought Steve was calling for him but then he let out a tiny whimper, "nghh...B-Bucky... _Bucky_..." 

Bucky was quickly losing his resolve, if he ever had any to begin with. Normally he wasn't at home during Steve's heats, not after the first few times when he had to hear the Omega be fucked into the mattress by another man. But he was here now, and it was so damn hard trying to control himself. Bucky felt himself stiffen. 

 _Just fuck him. Just this once, just once..._ despite knowing that Steve only wanted him because he was the only Alpha in close proximity, Bucky jumped out of his own bed and made his way towards Steve, but the sight of the other boy made him stop.

Steve was lying on his back, the covers thrown to one side, exposing his endless pale, flushed skin. The boy was panting, his eyes squeezed shut, hands grasping the covers as he tried desperately not to touch himself. His legs were spread apart, and he wasn't wearing any underwear underneath Bucky's shirt, giving the brunette a perfect view. 

"Steve."

Steve eyes snapped open, and he looked at Bucky with so much heat and want that the Alpha almost jumped him right there and then.

"B-Bucky...," Steve whimpered, spreading his legs a little bit more, "Bucky please...please, just this once, nghhh...p-please, please,  _please-"_

Bucky kissed him. He climbed on top of Steve and licked his way into the boy's mouth, the Omega trembling underneath him, hands grabbing at Bucky's shirt, trying to get it off. Bucky shut off his mind and moved his lips from Steve's lips to his neck and the blonde gasped softly. The Alpha took his sweet time, sucking red marks into he pale skin, making Steve squirm underneath him. He bit and licked until Steve was a moaning mess.

"B-Bucky...," the blonde gasped breathlessly. The brunette slipped a hand underneath his shirt, and brushed his fingers over Steve's ribs, and then pushed the shirt up over his head. The blonde was pretty much boneless, just letting Bucky do whatever he wanted.

The brunette's inner wolf growled happily as he sucked Steve's nipple into his mouth. The blonde mewled. His skin was almost too hot to touch, but Bucky didn't care as he kissed down the Omega's stomach, dipping his tongue into his navel, causing Steve to shiver almost violently.

The Alpha had briefly forgotten that Steve was commando, but he remembered the second he came face to face with his hard, leaking cock. It made him smirk, and for some reason he felt weirdly in control. He blew lightly onto the tip of the Omega's cock, causing Steve's gasp to end in a moan.

"D-Don't tease," the boy glared down at him weakly.  

"'m not teasing," Bucky said innocently as he kissed the inside of Steve's thigh. His head was spinning and his hard-on was getting painful. He desperately wanted to just fuck Steve, but he knew that this was the only time he'd ever get to be with him like that, and he wanted to savour it. Steve was just to perfect to give up, and Bucky knew he'd have to do that soon. 

But for now Steve was letting him do all those things he desperately wanted to. Slowly, Bucky licked a strip up Steve's cock. The boy jolted and gasped and Bucky ran his tongue over the slit, where salty pre cum was gathering. Steve's thighs were trembling, eyes shut, cheeks flushed. When Bucky swallowed his cock the blonde cried out and thrust his hips forward. The brunette held him down roughly with his hands on the boy's hips as he bobbed up and down. Steve's dick was nice and heavy against his tongue, and tasted like sweat. The brunette took more of the pulsating flesh into his hot mouth, swirling his tongue around the top. He felt dizzy with Steve's taste and smell and touch.

"Bucky, B-Bucky, o-oh... _oh_ ," Steve mewled like a cat and it only encouraged Bucky more. The blonde's hands clutched Bucky's head to his crotch, as if he couldn't stop himself, not that Bucky was complaining as he listened to the litany of moans spilling from Steve's lips, "f-fuck that's so g-good, more, m-more...," he was blabbering, voice breathless and strained. Bucky hollowed out his cheeks and Steve moaned again, louder, head pushed back into the pillows.

Bucky didn't get a warning as Steve spilled down his throat. He blinked when he felt the hot fluid hit the back of his throat, and pulled away and wiped the cum from his chin and swallowing the rest. Steve was an absolute wreck that was Steve, hair mused, eyes closed, lips swollen, cock still hard. 

Bucky's senses were slowly returning and once again he found himself panicking because he was doing things that he shouldn't have been doing. The brunette tried to pull away from Steve's amazing smell, but the blonde reached out and tangled his hand in Bucky's short hair,

"D-Don't," his voice was hoarse, "don't g-go please..."

 _You started it, better finish it Barnes._  Bucky knew it was just an excuse his mind made up to excuse his actions but Steve's hungry look made him not care anymore as he leaned down to kiss him again. The boy tastes sweeter somehow, and his skin felt even softer if that was possible.

Bucky took his time again, pressing feather light kisses across Steve's cheek and down his jaw, kissing bruises into his neck. He swirled his tongue around the omega's nipple and dipped it into his navel, slowly, carefully, until Steve was gasping and moaning weakly, fingers loosely threaded through Bucky's curls. 

Bucky wanted to  _ask,_ to make sure Steve was alright, that he wasn't...wasn't  _what?_ The brunette wished that he was drunk so he could blame his stupid, impulsive decisions on alcohol. Although he was questioning it, his lips continued travelling down the blonde's body almost like he couldn't stop himself. And how could he? Steve was warm and soft and pliant and  _wanting_ beneath him, mouth open as soft moans spilled out. He was so perfect and wonderful and Bucky just couldn't seem to pull away. 

 _Tell me you don't want this, tell me to stop..._ the words never left Bucky's mind as he pushed Steve's legs up, letting his hand brush against his backside. It caused the boy to shiver and Bucky stared down at him, suddenly hungry for all that pale skin. Steve's cheek was pressed into the pillow, eyes closed, hair sticking to his sweaty forehead. When Bucky's fingers brushed against the boy's hole, they came away wet and sticky with slick. 

Bucky decided that he went too far to stop now. Steve was little more than a broken mess on the sheets, and in all fairness the brunette didn't  _want_ to stop. He wanted to kiss and mark and fuck Steve until he couldn't think of any Alpha before him, just Bucky. 

Their mouths slid together in a messy, wet kiss as Bucky's finger gently eased itself inside Steve. The boy's heat clenched around the digit and he moaned into Bucky's mouth, desperately trying to pull him closer. But Bucky pulled away so he could watch his beauty writhing on the pillows, pushing another finger alongside the first. 

"F-Fuck...," Steve's hoarse voice sent a shiver down Bucky's spine, "B-Bucky..." when the brunette curled his fingers inside Steve, and the blonde whimpered. Bucky's mouth attacked his pale neck, kissing and licking until there was a line of hickeys down the boy's skin and three fingers inside him, pumping away furiously. Steve couldn't seem to stop talking, "Fuck me, B-Bucky...j-just do it you b-bastard...," his voice was just a whimpery whisper and it made Bucky kiss him again. 

He withdrew his fingers and bit Steve's shoulder, not hard to draw blood. His cock was aching and hard and leaking against his stomach but he had barely remembered it until now. And now that his mind had registered just how aroused he was, it was hard to ignore. The brunette gripped Steve's hips in a rough, bruising grip and pulled him forward, so he could press their hot, sweaty bodies together. When they kissed again it was a tangle of tongues, wet and hard and messy. Bucky aligned his cock with Steve's hole, feeling the heat rolling off of the boy in waves, and then ever so slowly he pushed in. 

Steve's toes curled and he cried out as Bucky entered him, inch by inch. The wonderful warmth swallowed the Alpha up and for a second Bucky was absolutely lost in Steve. He kissed the boy hungrily and for that perfect moment Steve was absolutely, only  _his._

"I love you," Bucky whispered. Steve's eyes snapped open and his breath came out in tiny puffs as he tried to concentrate enough to formulate words, which was proving hard with Bucky's cock inside him. The Alpha couldn't bear to hear his response so instead he crashed their lips together once more and then he thrust his hips forward. Being inside Steve felt so fucking good that Bucky couldn't do anything but lean his forehead against the boy's shoulder and gasp. 

His hips stuttered as his cock slid deeper into the boy, enveloped by the feverish heat. The boy felt Steve's walls clench around him, hot and wet and desperate. The blonde was clawing at the blankets his toes curled in pleasure, head thrown back into the pillows. Bucky's thrusts were hard but slow, and horribly precise. 

"F-Fuck," Steve's voice sounded almost like a sob, "Bucky... _Bucky..._ O-Oh God, nghhh...," his legs curled around Bucky's waist, drawing him closer, "more, m-more...p-please, harder...faster...a-anything j-just-" his words ended on a loud moan as Bucky picked his speed up. He could barely concentrate, and yet his thrusts turned hard and fast. Steve's body was being pressed into the bed as Bucky fucked him mercilessly. He couldn't seem to be able to stop anymore, he gathered up Steve's hands in one of his and pressed them down onto the blankets as he pounded Steve faster, unable to control himself. Now Bucky did feel drunk. He changed the angle of his hips slightly and when he thrust forward again, he hit something that caused Steve to cry out,

"Yes, yes, yes...," the boy blabbered on, his hands clenching into fists in Bucky's grip, trying to hold onto something, "B-Bucky I-I... _shit..._ "

"Mine," Bucky growled as heat spread through his body. He felt dizzy as he fucked Steve, and the boy looked like a debauched angel against the covers, " _Mine_ ," Bucky repeated possessively, "You're mine, Steve...just mine, I'm not letting anyone touch you ever again...," his voice was rough, his thrusts even more so. Steve didn't seem to mind either as his back arched off of the bed and his hips stuttered forward.

" _James._ " He sobbed, "J-James p-please, I-I can't-"

"I know, baby," Bucky words were low and raspy, whispered into Steve's neck, "It's alright, I've got you." 

He let go of the blonde's hands and immediately they came up to tangle in Bucky's hair and pull him in for another kiss. Heat coiled inside Bucky's stomach and Steve's hole throbbed around his cock. He gave a particularly hard thrust, his lips sliding with Steve's, and then the blonde clenched around him and came with a helpless little sob. Bucky kissed him hard, and spilled himself inside the blonde mere seconds later. 

His vision went white for a moment and all he was aware of was the wonderful heat of Steve, and the wetness of his cum against his stomach. When the brunette pulled away and out of Steve, his heart was pounding and he felt sated. Steve's eyes were half-lidded and sleepy, his lips swollen. There were kisses in purple and red on his body, and he looked so utterly wrecked that Bucky just wanted to take him again. 

And he could, because the next thing he knew was Steve was climbing into his lap and pressing their lips together and pushing his hot body down on Bucky again. 

* * *

 Bucky woke up before Steve, and all of the things they did the previous night flooded back to him. He stared at the cracked ceiling and felt angry and sick and guilty, but then he turned over and saw Steve, peacefully asleep and curled into Bucky's side, and those feelings disappeared. 

Bucky's heart pounded as he watched Steve; his long eyelashes and pale skin and the blonde hair falling into his eyes. Bucky wanted to reach out and touch him and kiss him awake, and then maybe fuck him again. But the boy must've been exhausted and-

 _He only let me fuck him because he was in heat,_ the thought came hard and sudden and it caused Bucky to sit up and slip out of bed. He went into the kitchen and pressed his forehead against the window, trying to stop himself from shaking. He didn't know what to do. Helplessly, the boy watched the city wake up below him, the sun coming out, as one thought circulated in his head.

_I love him, I love him, I love him..._

"Bucky?" Steve's voice was still hoarse and when Bucky turned around the boy was back in his shirt. He looked sleepy and unsure, his cheeks red.

"Hey," Bucky didn't know what else to say. His stomach was in a knot. Steve shifted awkwardly, and stared at the carpet. 

"I...um...," he clearly didn't know what to say, "a-about last night-"

"I'm sorry," the words spilled out of Bucky suddenly and caused Steve to look up, "It won't happen again, I won't...d-do it...again. It will all go back to normal and next time I will bring you a new Alpha and-"

"No." 

"Steve...," Bucky blinked. Steve looked  _angry,_ his cheeks flushed. Bucky thought that maybe he hated him. 

"How can you say that?!" Steve was shaking, and Bucky realized that he had tears in his eyes. It made his heart twist, "After having your way with me how can you say you'll just give me to someone else?!"

"Steve-" Bucky tried again, reaching out to the blonde. The Omega stumbled away,

"No," he said again, shakily and close to crying, "How do you t-think I feel? H-Having to let s-some stranger f-fuck me every month j-just because I c-can't control my body," he sniffed and looked away and blushed, "and t-then you...y-you had m-me last night and I-I'm just supposed to give that up?"

"Steve," Bucky ran a hand down his face, "Until you find an Alpha-"

"I  _found_ an Alpha," Steve sounded desperate, " _You're_ my Alpha," he looked absolutely heartbroken, "I know y-you hate it, a-and I know y-you think l-last night was a mistake, b-but...b-but...," Steve wiped his eyes angrily with his sleeve and looked away and whispered, "I love you."

Bucky didn't care. He really fucking didn't. Not anymore.

He walked up to Steve and picked up the boy as if he weighed nothing. Steve squeaked as his legs wrapped around Bucky's on their own accord. Bucky pushed the blonde up against the wall and they were finally almost the same height. 

"B-Bucky-"

The brunette leaned forward and kissed Steve. It was different from the night before, softer and gentler and yet more passionate somehow. Steve tensed for a second and then he melted against Bucky as if he was made of sugar, his arms wrapped around the brunette's neck. 

Bucky didn't know how long they kissed. Their kisses were slow and deep, Bucky's hands were wrapped around Steve's back, keeping him close. It seemed to last an eternity and the Alpha was okay with that.

 


	30. I wanna be forever young

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter guys!

**Day 30 – Growing old together**

Steve didn't think he'd ever get used to it. It came as a shock every morning, the same way it had come when he saw Peggy in her final days. She had been so lovely so full of life, and moments before death she was just like any of the others – just a woman, not an agent, not a hero.

When Steve looked at himself in the mirror, he didn't see a hero anymore either. Each morning he expected to see himself with golden hair and perfect muscles, immortal, perfect, flawless. Seventy years in an ice block did something to you, it made Steve think that he would be young and strong forever.

When the first grey hair appeared, he ignored it. You could barely see it in his golden locks anyway. When he saw the first wrinkle he just thought he just smiled too much. Slowly, over the years, his strength left him, his vigour, his stamina, all seeping out of him until they all but disappeared.

It happened to all of them; the Avengers. Nobody was immortal but Thor, but he had long ago returned to rule Asgard. There were new Avengers now, young, younger than Peter Parker too.

Steve saw time in himself every morning when he looked in the mirror, and he saw it in his comrades as well. Natasha's wrinkled hands shook, Sam had to wear glasses and Clint could not see at all. Wanda had dementia and rarely remembered things, and instead of fits of rage, Bruce had fits of spasms. He could not even change into the Hulk anymore. Tony was in a wheelchair, Peter had grandchildren.

They were old, their glory days long gone. But it was alright because they had good lives, good lives full of helping others and love and friendship. Steve was happy with his life, and happy with the peace. The Avengers lived in little houses on one of Tony's private islands, away from the pain and fighting that they faced in Russia and New York.

Steve looked at his reflection. He was in a t-shirt and jeans, getting ready for a barbeque they were having on the beach. The man's eyes glanced over himself and he sighed. He couldn't get used to it; the silver hair, the wrinkles around his eyes. His muscles were still there but they were not as defined.

Steve straightened out his shirt.

"Steve?"

The blonde looked up and saw Bucky in the doorway and immediately all of his insecurities flew out of his head and he smiled that stupid goofy smile that he smiled every time he saw Bucky,

"Hey," he said. Bucky came over and kissed him. No matter how much everyone changed, Bucky remained the same. Or maybe Steve could just look past his weakness and wrinkles and greying hair, and see the Bucky from Brooklyn in his suspenders and oil-stained hands.

His lips were still the same, slightly chapped and smiling, and he still smelled the same, like motor oil and metal and cologne.

"You alright punk?" Bucky asked, nuzzling into Steve's neck. Steve smiled and ruffled his hair,

"Yeah, jerk. Let's go, eh?"

The two walked out into the sunlight garden hand-in-hand. Vision was tending the barbeque, unchanged despite all his years. Wanda was curled up in a chair, Natasha at her side. Sometimes Wanda would blabber in Russian about Pietro if she forgot things, and Black Widow would soothe her in the same language.

Steve sank into a chair, feeling weirdly serene. Bucky sat next to him, his arm around his husband's shoulders. It all made sense, like this. It was the end, for all of them, together. They fought and lived and loved together, and they were all peacefully awaiting death together too.

Except Bucky. Bucky would be forever young – at least in Steve's eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Massive thanks to all these wonderful people;  
> bethispixie  
> Fearless_Diva  
> Galen Dupree  
> Hand_of_the_Alex  
> IceCream313  
> Ly_Phoi_San  
> owls_and_horses  
> Skathidottir  
> StarBucksPanda  
> waiod_64  
> Wifey  
> Writerofthelorde  
> and a special shoutout to #number1bae bloatedblonde <3  
> Thankyou so much for reading and leaving sweet comments x  
> PS - please check out my original work - Padrilon's Bastards (I put all the heart and soul I have left into it so please check it out and leave me some kudos and a comment if you like it thankyou, love you all :*  
> ~Fly on


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